PAGE 1
Panel 1- A large heavyset man (AL) in a messy security guard uniform is escorting a young man in a perfectly neat security guard uniform (MIKE). AL, who’s about 40-ish, is medium height, with messy black hair (or what’s left of it) sticking out from a wide-brim security hat that sits off to one side slightly. He also has a stain here and there on his uniform. MIKE, who’s in his early twenties, is wearing the same uniform but it is freshly pressed, and neatly tucked, and he has short brown hair with a buzz hair cut (not military but short) hidden under his perfectly straight hat. MIKE has a heroic look about him, tall with a heroic jaw (not over exaggerated though) and a medium-muscular build. They are walking along the sidewalk just outside doors to the mall.
AL: AND THAT'S PRETTY MUCH THAT. SHE’S A PRETTY BIG MALL BUT WITH YOU, ME, DARYL, ANDY, CHRIS, AND STEVE IT WON'T BE TOO BAD.
AL: YOU WON'T RUN INTO MUCH TROUBLE HERE.
AL: SO, WELCOME ABOARD AND ALL THAT.
Panel 2- Close-up of MIKE’S face. He looks slightly overwhelmed as he looks over at the mall entrance.
MIKE: THANKS, SIR.
Panel 3- Faraway shot of the entire mall and the parking lot. The parking lot is fairly full and bustling. The sun is shining and in the distance surrounding the mall are tons of suburban homes and lots of green trees. MIKE and AL are just dots.
AL: SO, AHH, HAVE A GOOD FIRST DAY.
TITLE: MIKE MANCHESTER, MALL SECURITY: FIRST DAY
CREDITS
PAGE 2
Panel 1- MIKE is talking into a payphone just off to the side of the food court. Tons of people are in the background sitting, eating, and waiting on line.
MIKE: YEAH, IT'S NOT BAD AT ALL. I REALLY LIKE IT SO FAR. I JUST HAD MY LUNCH BREAK SO…
MIKE: YEAH THEY'RE ALL PRETTY COOL.
MIKE: OK, GET TO CLASS MICHELLE. LOVE YOU. BYE.
Panel 2- MIKE is walking away from the payphone and food court, about to get back to work. MIKE is whistling.
JACK(OFF PANEL): MAN O MAN…
Panel 3- JACK walks up next to MIKE. JACK, who looks to be the same age as MIKE, and almost as tall as him, but nowhere near as neat. He’s wearing a black T-shirt, jeans and mid-length black leather jacket and has black messy/spiky hair. He’s checking out MIKE’S new uniform.
JACK: I LOVE ME A MAN IN UNIFORM!
MIKE: JACK, GET LOST. I’M WORKING.
JACK: I CAN’T RESIST YOU THOUGH.
Panel 4- JACK is trying to hug MIKE but MIKE is fending him off. JACK is making kissy face at MIKE.
JACK: C’MERE BIG BOY!
MIKE: KNOCK IT OFF LOSER!
Panel 5- MIKE is walking away as JACK is left behind laughing. He suddenly notices a girl passing by.
JACK: WHY DOESN’T HE LOVE ME ANYMORE?
JACK: MIKEY! WHY DID YOU LEAVE ME FOR MALL SECURITY? WHY?
JACK: HEY! STACY, BABY, WHAT’S UP?
PAGE 3
Panel 1- MIKE is walking along moping/kicking the dirt (figuratively speaking).
MIKE(grumbling): What a friggin’…jerk…shoulda…
Panel 2- Close up shot of MIKE’S walkie-talkie on his belt.
AL(Through the walkie-talkie): MIKE? YOU THERE?
Panel 3- MIKE grabs the walkie-talkie.
MIKE: I’M HERE AL. WHAT’S UP?
AL(walkie-talkie): WE GOT A SHOPLIFTER, SHOULD BE HEADING YOUR WAY!
Panel 4- From around the corner a muscular guy, who looks to be in his mid-to-late-twenties, comes running towards MIKE at full speed. He has longish hair, a partial beard, and is wearing a cutoff black T-shirt showing off his tattoos. In the background he passes the centerpiece of the mall, a large art deco sculpture in a fountain. The sculpture looks like a large atomic symbol with different rings that rotate around. (This is important in future stories, not so much in this one) The large man is carrying a plastic bag full of something. He hasn’t noticed MIKE yet.
Panel 5- Close up of MIKE as his eyes narrow. He has his game face on. He holds up the walkie-talkie.
MIKE: I GOT ‘EM.
PAGE 4
Panel 1- Big panel shot from just a few feet above and behind MIKE. The shoplifter has stopped dead in his tracks seeing MIKE. Miscellaneous shoppers run off to either side of the mall, leaving the center empty. The shoplifter should be at the far end and MIKE in the foreground, like an old West shootout. MIKE is putting his walkie-talkie on his belt.
AL(walkie-talkie): BE CAREFUL. DARYL AND STEVE ARE ON THEIR WAY.
Panel 2- Small panel on the left side of Panel 1. A close up of MIKE’S face. His eyes are narrowed, and his hat casts a small shadow over them. A look of grim determination.
Panel 3- Small panel on the right side of Panel 1. Close up of the shoplifter’s face. He’s smirking.
SHOPLIFTER: FRESH MEAT…
Panel 4- The shoplifter turns and runs off in the other direction, looking over his shoulder, taunting MIKE.
SHOPLIFTER: C’MON ROOKIE!
Panel 5- MIKE tears off after the shoplifter. Mall shoppers all look like frightened villagers, keeping to the sides.
PAGE 5
Panel 1- The shoplifter charges between DARYL and STEVE and knocks them to the ground. DARYL is a heavyset guy of average height, and STEVE is shorter but more muscular. A rectangular fountain and a huge department store are seen ahead of him.
Panel 2- MIKE whips around the corner charging at full speed. He flies past DARYL and STEVE as they are rubbing bruised body parts.
DARYL: GO GET ‘EM MAN!
Panel 3- A forward shot of the shoplifter as he laughs to himself while looking over his shoulder. Not too far behind him on the other side of the fountain is MIKE.
Panel 4- Dramatic side shot of MIKE in mid leap over the fountain.
Panel 5- MIKE is about 50 feet or so behind the shoplifter down a side hallway. The shoplifter is about to go out a set of glass doors leading outside. The sunlight pours in.
PAGE 6
Panel 1- MIKE bursts out of the mall doors, temporarily blinded by the bright sun. He raises his arm to help block the sun.
MIKE: DAMN…
Panel 2- MIKE walks out to the edge of the sidewalk, searching the parking lot for any sign of the shoplifter. This should be the same set of doors and parking lot from the first page. Shot from behind MIKE so we can see the busy parking lot. Just about twenty feet in front of MIKE is a small car with the blinker on waiting for the people to get in their car from the first or second parking spot.
MIKE: WHERE’D HE GO? COULDN’T HAVE GOTTEN THAT FAR.
Panel 3- From MIKE’S left a huge beat up black pickup truck comes flying towards him. It’s the shoplifter.
MIKE: WHA?
Panel 4- Tight shot of the shoplifter behind the wheel, grimacing like a madman as he slams on the gas.
SHOPLIFTER: YOU’RE FINSIHED KID!
Panel 5- Shot from behind MIKE as he stands frozen in front of the huge truck as it barrels down on him.
PAGE 7
Panel 1- JACK tackles MIKE as the truck shoots up the curb and just nearly runs them both down.
MIKE: OOOF!
Panel 2- JACK and MIKE lie on the sidewalk. In the far background the truck is driving off, turning down a parking lot aisle.
MIKE: COUGH…THANKS.
JACK: HEY, IF YOU DIED, WHO WOULD I MAKE FUN OF?
Panel 3- MIKE and JACK get to their feet. Shoppers stand gathered by the mall doors watching the event.
MIKE: I CAN’T BELIEVE I LET HIM GET AWAY.
JACK: WHAT? DUDE, YOU ALMOST DIED TRYING TO CATCH SOME GUY WHO POCKETED SOME CRAP!
MIKE: THAT’S NOT THE POINT.
Panel 4- Flip the scene and now we’re looking from where the shoppers are. We can see MIKE and JACK turned sideways, standing face to face. In the background/parking lot, we can see that the small car is still standing there with its blinker on. Behind it is just the faint image of the black pickup truck speeding towards us.
JACK: THAT IS THE POINT! YOU ALWAYS GET SO CARRIED AWAY! IT’S JUST A JOB! AND YOU’RE GOING TO GET YOURSELF KILLED FOR IT?
MIKE: IT’S NOT JUST A JOB, IT’S MY JOB, NOW.
Panel 5- Close up of their faces, but with enough background for placement of word balloons. They’re getting quite mad at each other now. In between their faces we can see fairly clearly now the black pickup is speeding towards the small car with its blinker on.
JACK: YOU ALWAYS DO THIS!
MIKE: WHAT’S THAT?
JACK: TAKE YOURSELF AND YOUR JOB TOO SERIOUSLY!
MIKE: I TREAT A JOB WITH RESPONSIBILITY, AND THAT’S WHY I HAVE A JOB!
JACK: LOOK, IF I WANTED A JOB, I…
PAGE 8
Panel 1- The black pickup slams into the back of the small car. The small car flies forward, it’s blinker still on. The driver is some doofy looking guy. He looks scared/shocked out of his mind.
SFX: WHAAMMM!
Panel 2- The small car is literally flying towards MIKE and JACK and the mall doors. MIKE pushes JACK back and starts to run towards the doors.
MIKE: GET BACK!
Panel 3- MIKE is pushing people out of the way, the car hits the curb and flies up a couple of feet behind MIKE.
MIKE: RUN! GO, GO, GO!
Panel 4- Large panel. MIKE grabs a small girl and dives to the side, turning in mid-air to take the brunt of the force. The car, flipping through the air, smashes through the doors missing MIKE by mere inches. Shards of glass go flying.
SFX: SMASH!
PAGE 9
Panel 1- AL comes walking up, standing inside the mall, next to the smashed up car embedded in the wall. The driver is hanging onto the door, dazed but unhurt. JACK is in the background getting up. MIKE, standing just outside the demolished doors, is brushing the glass off of himself as the little girl he saved runs to her mom. The black pickup can be seen in the far background speeding away.
MIKE: SORRY SIR. HE GOT AWAY.
Showing posts with label old school. Show all posts
Showing posts with label old school. Show all posts
Sunday, March 1, 2009
Mike Manchester: Mall Security Issue #2 (original script)
Page 1
CAPTION: This is Bobby.
BOBBY is playing video games. We see him from the back close up.
CAPTION: He’s beaten every game here…
BOBBY: Oh yeah, eat fireball suckers! And now to finish you off…
CAPTION: At least twice.
Pull back more and see people running back and forth screaming outside the arcade.
CAPTION: He takes his video games very seriously. So seriously, in fact, that he is oblivious to life outside of his arcade.
BOBBY: The piece de resistance! FLAMING HEAD PUNCHY!
All the power suddenly goes out. The emergency lights kick on. Back up some more and BOBBY falls to his knees.
BOBBY: No…
Overhead shot of BOBBY arms stretched to the Heavens, head back and screaming…
BOBBY: NOOOOOOOOOO!!!
Page 2
Full splash page of MIKE, JACK, DARYL, MEGAN, and DR. LOOMIS looking out in the mall with time-lost warriors going berserk. TITLE.
Page 3
The plan.
MIKE: Daryl, I want you to take Megan and run down to O.B.Ellis’. Grab as many people as you can and hide them in there. You know how to work the security gates right?
DARYL: Yeah.
MIKE: Good. There’s a backup generator for the big stores so the gates should be fine. Jack, you and me are gonna hold off as many of these guys as we can until uh…I’m sorry I don’t even know your name.
DR.LOOMIS: It’s Loomis, Dr. Ernesto Loomis.
MIKE: Ok, while we hold these guys off you get that machine of yours fixed and get these guys outta here.
DR.LOOMIS: I…just want to apologize for the mess…I didn’t do enough to protest this inane idea…I should have…
MIKE: Look, no one’s seriously hurt…yet. You want to set this right, you shut that thing off. Alright everyone…get going.
MEGAN: Mike…
MIKE looks over at her.
MEGAN: Mike…be careful.
She grabs his hand and squeezes.
MIKE(Smiles): You too. Daryl, keep her safe.
DARYL: Will do Mike.
DARYL AND MEGAN run off taking the sides skirting the battle.
SHANG TZE watches MEGAN intently as she goes.
MIKE: Ok Loomis, you take cover, we’ll clear a path to your machine.
LOOMIS nods. MIKE and JACK plan an attack.
MIKE: Ok I think we should…
JACK: I’ll take the cowboy.
JACK charges.
Page 4
JACK charges, grabs a gunslinger’s gun and hits him with a right cross and knocks him out. JACK turns as a Viking horde charges. He whips the gun around in his hands and fires. With each shot a sword or axe goes flying from one of the Vikings’ hands. MIKE shakes his head and charges out and dodges scimitars and daggers, and lands a few kung fu kicks and punches.
JACK: Yo, check it out.
JACK nods towards another battle, as he stands back to back with MIKE exchanging blows with pirates.
Page 5
The VIKING KING, and SHANG TZE THE PIRATE CAPTAIN are fighting an epic battle. The VIKING KING is a gigantic monster of a man, with a huge broadsword. SHANG TZE isn’t as big as the VIKING KING but he is huge nonetheless. And what he lacks in muscle he makes up in agility. Their swords are clanging against each other in a graceful dance of death. LOOMIS is inspecting his damaged machine in the background. Zoom in on him.
LOOMIS: This is not good…this energy signature is highly unstable. The slightest rupture to the casing…
Suddenly the VIKING KING’S sword comes flying in and the pommel smacks LOOMIS in the head knocking him out cold.
DEXTER comes to, and stares in slack jaw wonder.
DEXTER: Hello? Mike?
Page 6
Over DEXTER’S head we see JACK, MIKE, and SHANG TZE as well as the hundred or so vikings, pirates, and knights are engaged in a major league rumble. A flaming arrow hits Nacho Horn, setting it ablaze, and DEXTER stumbles over the counter and bumps into the Quantum Field Engine as the VIKING KING gets slashed by SHANG TZE and is sent crashing into the QFE. The VIKING KING and DEXTER both glow and then disappear. The SHANG TZE sees this and skulks over, and stands over the QFE.
Page 7
MIKE and JACK are battle-weary. MIKE, holding a sword fending off attacks, and JACK is blocking with a battle-axe.
MIKE: We can’t hold this pace up. Sooner or later we’re gonna…
A viking takes advantage of MIKE’S diverted attention and slashes him with his sword. MIKE drops to a knee.
JACK: MIKE! Son of a…
JACK dodges the viking’s second slash and JACK stomps on his sword ripping it free from his grip. JACK then pummels the viking with a series of punches. The viking hits the floor, and JACK picks up his sword and is just about to drive it into the viking’s chest as MIKE grabs his arm.
MIKE: Jack…don’t…I’m alright. C’mon…we have to check on Loomis see if he figured a way to stop this.
JACK: Right.
JACK stabs the sword next to the viking.
Page 8
MIKE and JACK look around for LOOMIS and the QFE.
MIKE: Where the hell is he?
JACK: There.
MIKE and JACK move some flipped tables and LOOMIS is lying there, knocked unconscious.
MIKE: Dammit!
JACK: Whoever snagged it couldn’t have gotten too far.
MIKE looks around and sees only the Vikings, Gunslingers, and Knights. No pirates are left.
MIKE: Where are the pirates? They must have taken Loomis’ machine.
MIKE’S walkie-talkie screeches to life.
DARYL: Mike! It’s Daryl! They’re coming in before the gate’s all the way down! Mike!
A loud squealing noise erupts from the walkie-talkie before it falls silent.
MIKE: Oh God, Megan…Daryl, no…
MIKE tears off towards O.B.Elllis’ Department store, with JACK in tow. MIKE is leaping over warriors in mid-battle.
Page 9
MIKE runs up as the security gates slam down.
MIKE: NO! Open these gates!
MIKE begins to bang on the gate. SHANG TZE sneers at MIKE. He says something in Chinese and then turns. His underlings turn and walk away. One is carrying the QFE; one of the others is carrying MEGAN. She is bound and gagged.
MIKE: MEGAN! MEGAN! NO!
JACK runs up.
JACK: What’s up?
MIKE: They took Megan. And Loomis’ machine. Who knows what they did with Daryl. Dammit. We need to get in there! C’mon!
MIKE takes off with JACK following again.
MIKE: We have to get to the stock doors before they seal those too.
JACK stops MIKE short as a massive pirate jumps down in front of them.
The Pirate growls at them.
Page 10
BOBBY runs in and punches the pirate in the head.
BOBBY: FLAMING HEAD PUNCHY!
MIKE and JACK look down in amazement.
MIKE: Bobby?
BOBBY is in a fury attacking the pirate. MIKE AND JACK run into the service doors. They make their way down the bare internal mall hallway, then turn and pass through a back door and through a stock room with people and employees cowering.
Page 11
MIKE and JACK burst through the swinging doors out of the stock room to the sales floor. SHANG TZE’S men have cleared the Men’s Department, tossing all the racks of clothes aside. The Pirates have set the QFE on a display next to SHANG TZE, and MEGAN on his other side.
Page 12
MIKE points to MEGAN.
MIKE: Let her go.
MIKE takes a few steps closer.
MIKE: Now.
The Pirates all look at SHANG TZE. SHANG TZE bursts out laughing. His crew follows his lead. SHANG TZE motions to one of the Pirates. The Pirate reaches behind him and drops DARYL to the floor. DARYL is knocked out and bleeding from the head. Not too severe, but he’s out cold.
MIKE: This is your final warning. Turn the girl and the machine over to me.
SHANG TZE’S face becomes a scowl. JACK charges right for SHANG TZE who throws a boot right to his jaw knocking him back. MIKE stares SHANG TZE down and two Pirates grab and restrain JACK.
Page 13
SHANG TZE motions and a Pirate steps forth from the back. He has a huge scimitar, and is more than twice the size of MIKE. SHANG TZE commands him in Chinese.
The Pirate runs forward sword raised and slams the sword down. MIKE stands perfectly still until at the last moment he sidesteps, the blade just barely missing him. The Pirate, with his sword buried in the ground, looks up at MIKE inches from his face, and MIKE smashes his nose in with his elbow. The Pirate hits the floor, bleeding. MIKE rips the sword out of the ground and points at SHANG TZE.
MIKE: You.
SHANG TZE whips his sword out of it’s scabbard and steps into the circle of Pirates. The Pirates begin chanting ‘SHANG TZE’.
SHANG TZE: You will die.
Page 14
SHANG TZE lunges forward, MIKE parries. MEGAN looks on terrified. JACK watches, struggling to free himself from the Pirates’ grip. It looks like MIKE is losing. A few slashes on MIKE’S arms and cheek. MIKE ducks and SHANG TZE slices a head of a mannequin. MIKE spins and kicks him in the midsection.
Page 15
SHANG TZE and MIKE exchange blows and their swords clang together. Both men push against their swords to trhow the other off balance. Their faces are less than a foot apart.
SHANG TZE: I must thank you. Thank you for bringing me to your world and handing me this magic. Already it has imbued me with the power to learn your speech. Once I kill you…I will use the magic in that box to destroy and conquer this world, and others if I wish.
SHANG TZE: And while I lay waste to all that I see, and take what I will from the grip of a million dead men, your wench will be my personal entertainment. Till I grow bored of her and leave what’s left for my crew.
The Pirates cheer.
Close up of MIKE’S face; he’s obviously been brought to a breaking point and pushed way past it.
MIKE: Over…my…dead…
MIKE pushes SHANG TZE back and leaps in the air, sword in both hands, raised way above his head.
MIKE: BODY!
Page 16
MIKE slams the sword down, SHANG TZE blocking awkwardly, obviously not expecting such a fight. MIKE continues to assault him with a barrage of powerful blows. It seems MIKE has the advantage, but then SHANG TZE sees his opening and backhands him. MIKE is sent crashing to the floor. MEGAN and JACK both flinch. SHANG TZE is standing above MIKE. MIKE lies dazed on his side holding his jaw.
SHANG TZE: I give you this, pup. You have more fight in you than I expected.
Page 17
SHANG TZE turns and begins to walk back to the QFE. He places his hand upon it. Energy glows around him.
SHANG TZE: Perhaps I may spare your life, and merely cut off a limb or two if you were to tell me how to operate your Sorcerer’s Box. Its raw power surges through my bones.
SHANG TZE looks back over his shoulder at MIKE.
SHANG TZE: No? Oh well. I wasn’t going to spare you anyhow. I will just have to handle this myself.
SHANG TZE motions to two Pirates and they lift the QFE and bring it in the center of the circle. The two Pirates run back to their place. SHANG TZE raises both hands above his head. MIKE looks up, very surprised.
Page 18
Full splash page of SHANG TZE slamming his hands against the QFE. THE Quantum energy courses through his body.
Page 19
SHANG TZE removes his hands and stares down at them. The QFE is pumping a stream of pure Quantum energy into him.
SHANG TZE: The power! I never imagined.
A wave of his hand and the celing is decimated. Another wave and a portal opens and spouts a hellish flame. SHANG TZE smiles a twisted and evil grin. He points at one of his crew and the energy unmakes him into swirling energy. SHANG TZE laughs. Shot of SHANG TZE coursing with energy, and MIKE pushing himself up to his feet.
SHANG TZE: And now, pup, I shall send you to a thousand Hells.
SHANG TZE turns to face MIKE who is now standing there defiantly.
SHANG TZE: So, the pup faces his death as a man.
Page 20
MIKE kicks the scimitar up into his hand and hurls it through the Q.F.E. A large panel in the center of this page shows the Q.F.E. as it explodes with Quantum energy and it dissipates in a large circle. The energy dissipates throughout the mall. A shot of the time strewn warriors as they fade from existence as the energy passes through them.
Page 21
SHANG TZE looks around, enraged by his defeat and lunges for MIKE and his hands are mere inches from MIKE’S neck as he fades away and passes through MIKE harmless as a ghost.
SHANG TZE (fading): I…WILL…HAVE…MY…REVENGE…
Page 22
The field goes down and people rush in. Police, fire department, etc. MIKE unties MEGAN and they hug each other, then look at each other as the hug becomes an embrace. JACK looking at MIKE is smiling, then looks towards the doors and the rushing people. His face goes slack.
Page 23
Enter: MICHELLE. A splash page of MIKE & MEGAN in the foreground, silhouetted, and MICHELLE. She looks very surprised, but not angry.
MICHELLE: Mike?
CAPTION: This is Bobby.
BOBBY is playing video games. We see him from the back close up.
CAPTION: He’s beaten every game here…
BOBBY: Oh yeah, eat fireball suckers! And now to finish you off…
CAPTION: At least twice.
Pull back more and see people running back and forth screaming outside the arcade.
CAPTION: He takes his video games very seriously. So seriously, in fact, that he is oblivious to life outside of his arcade.
BOBBY: The piece de resistance! FLAMING HEAD PUNCHY!
All the power suddenly goes out. The emergency lights kick on. Back up some more and BOBBY falls to his knees.
BOBBY: No…
Overhead shot of BOBBY arms stretched to the Heavens, head back and screaming…
BOBBY: NOOOOOOOOOO!!!
Page 2
Full splash page of MIKE, JACK, DARYL, MEGAN, and DR. LOOMIS looking out in the mall with time-lost warriors going berserk. TITLE.
Page 3
The plan.
MIKE: Daryl, I want you to take Megan and run down to O.B.Ellis’. Grab as many people as you can and hide them in there. You know how to work the security gates right?
DARYL: Yeah.
MIKE: Good. There’s a backup generator for the big stores so the gates should be fine. Jack, you and me are gonna hold off as many of these guys as we can until uh…I’m sorry I don’t even know your name.
DR.LOOMIS: It’s Loomis, Dr. Ernesto Loomis.
MIKE: Ok, while we hold these guys off you get that machine of yours fixed and get these guys outta here.
DR.LOOMIS: I…just want to apologize for the mess…I didn’t do enough to protest this inane idea…I should have…
MIKE: Look, no one’s seriously hurt…yet. You want to set this right, you shut that thing off. Alright everyone…get going.
MEGAN: Mike…
MIKE looks over at her.
MEGAN: Mike…be careful.
She grabs his hand and squeezes.
MIKE(Smiles): You too. Daryl, keep her safe.
DARYL: Will do Mike.
DARYL AND MEGAN run off taking the sides skirting the battle.
SHANG TZE watches MEGAN intently as she goes.
MIKE: Ok Loomis, you take cover, we’ll clear a path to your machine.
LOOMIS nods. MIKE and JACK plan an attack.
MIKE: Ok I think we should…
JACK: I’ll take the cowboy.
JACK charges.
Page 4
JACK charges, grabs a gunslinger’s gun and hits him with a right cross and knocks him out. JACK turns as a Viking horde charges. He whips the gun around in his hands and fires. With each shot a sword or axe goes flying from one of the Vikings’ hands. MIKE shakes his head and charges out and dodges scimitars and daggers, and lands a few kung fu kicks and punches.
JACK: Yo, check it out.
JACK nods towards another battle, as he stands back to back with MIKE exchanging blows with pirates.
Page 5
The VIKING KING, and SHANG TZE THE PIRATE CAPTAIN are fighting an epic battle. The VIKING KING is a gigantic monster of a man, with a huge broadsword. SHANG TZE isn’t as big as the VIKING KING but he is huge nonetheless. And what he lacks in muscle he makes up in agility. Their swords are clanging against each other in a graceful dance of death. LOOMIS is inspecting his damaged machine in the background. Zoom in on him.
LOOMIS: This is not good…this energy signature is highly unstable. The slightest rupture to the casing…
Suddenly the VIKING KING’S sword comes flying in and the pommel smacks LOOMIS in the head knocking him out cold.
DEXTER comes to, and stares in slack jaw wonder.
DEXTER: Hello? Mike?
Page 6
Over DEXTER’S head we see JACK, MIKE, and SHANG TZE as well as the hundred or so vikings, pirates, and knights are engaged in a major league rumble. A flaming arrow hits Nacho Horn, setting it ablaze, and DEXTER stumbles over the counter and bumps into the Quantum Field Engine as the VIKING KING gets slashed by SHANG TZE and is sent crashing into the QFE. The VIKING KING and DEXTER both glow and then disappear. The SHANG TZE sees this and skulks over, and stands over the QFE.
Page 7
MIKE and JACK are battle-weary. MIKE, holding a sword fending off attacks, and JACK is blocking with a battle-axe.
MIKE: We can’t hold this pace up. Sooner or later we’re gonna…
A viking takes advantage of MIKE’S diverted attention and slashes him with his sword. MIKE drops to a knee.
JACK: MIKE! Son of a…
JACK dodges the viking’s second slash and JACK stomps on his sword ripping it free from his grip. JACK then pummels the viking with a series of punches. The viking hits the floor, and JACK picks up his sword and is just about to drive it into the viking’s chest as MIKE grabs his arm.
MIKE: Jack…don’t…I’m alright. C’mon…we have to check on Loomis see if he figured a way to stop this.
JACK: Right.
JACK stabs the sword next to the viking.
Page 8
MIKE and JACK look around for LOOMIS and the QFE.
MIKE: Where the hell is he?
JACK: There.
MIKE and JACK move some flipped tables and LOOMIS is lying there, knocked unconscious.
MIKE: Dammit!
JACK: Whoever snagged it couldn’t have gotten too far.
MIKE looks around and sees only the Vikings, Gunslingers, and Knights. No pirates are left.
MIKE: Where are the pirates? They must have taken Loomis’ machine.
MIKE’S walkie-talkie screeches to life.
DARYL: Mike! It’s Daryl! They’re coming in before the gate’s all the way down! Mike!
A loud squealing noise erupts from the walkie-talkie before it falls silent.
MIKE: Oh God, Megan…Daryl, no…
MIKE tears off towards O.B.Elllis’ Department store, with JACK in tow. MIKE is leaping over warriors in mid-battle.
Page 9
MIKE runs up as the security gates slam down.
MIKE: NO! Open these gates!
MIKE begins to bang on the gate. SHANG TZE sneers at MIKE. He says something in Chinese and then turns. His underlings turn and walk away. One is carrying the QFE; one of the others is carrying MEGAN. She is bound and gagged.
MIKE: MEGAN! MEGAN! NO!
JACK runs up.
JACK: What’s up?
MIKE: They took Megan. And Loomis’ machine. Who knows what they did with Daryl. Dammit. We need to get in there! C’mon!
MIKE takes off with JACK following again.
MIKE: We have to get to the stock doors before they seal those too.
JACK stops MIKE short as a massive pirate jumps down in front of them.
The Pirate growls at them.
Page 10
BOBBY runs in and punches the pirate in the head.
BOBBY: FLAMING HEAD PUNCHY!
MIKE and JACK look down in amazement.
MIKE: Bobby?
BOBBY is in a fury attacking the pirate. MIKE AND JACK run into the service doors. They make their way down the bare internal mall hallway, then turn and pass through a back door and through a stock room with people and employees cowering.
Page 11
MIKE and JACK burst through the swinging doors out of the stock room to the sales floor. SHANG TZE’S men have cleared the Men’s Department, tossing all the racks of clothes aside. The Pirates have set the QFE on a display next to SHANG TZE, and MEGAN on his other side.
Page 12
MIKE points to MEGAN.
MIKE: Let her go.
MIKE takes a few steps closer.
MIKE: Now.
The Pirates all look at SHANG TZE. SHANG TZE bursts out laughing. His crew follows his lead. SHANG TZE motions to one of the Pirates. The Pirate reaches behind him and drops DARYL to the floor. DARYL is knocked out and bleeding from the head. Not too severe, but he’s out cold.
MIKE: This is your final warning. Turn the girl and the machine over to me.
SHANG TZE’S face becomes a scowl. JACK charges right for SHANG TZE who throws a boot right to his jaw knocking him back. MIKE stares SHANG TZE down and two Pirates grab and restrain JACK.
Page 13
SHANG TZE motions and a Pirate steps forth from the back. He has a huge scimitar, and is more than twice the size of MIKE. SHANG TZE commands him in Chinese.
The Pirate runs forward sword raised and slams the sword down. MIKE stands perfectly still until at the last moment he sidesteps, the blade just barely missing him. The Pirate, with his sword buried in the ground, looks up at MIKE inches from his face, and MIKE smashes his nose in with his elbow. The Pirate hits the floor, bleeding. MIKE rips the sword out of the ground and points at SHANG TZE.
MIKE: You.
SHANG TZE whips his sword out of it’s scabbard and steps into the circle of Pirates. The Pirates begin chanting ‘SHANG TZE’.
SHANG TZE: You will die.
Page 14
SHANG TZE lunges forward, MIKE parries. MEGAN looks on terrified. JACK watches, struggling to free himself from the Pirates’ grip. It looks like MIKE is losing. A few slashes on MIKE’S arms and cheek. MIKE ducks and SHANG TZE slices a head of a mannequin. MIKE spins and kicks him in the midsection.
Page 15
SHANG TZE and MIKE exchange blows and their swords clang together. Both men push against their swords to trhow the other off balance. Their faces are less than a foot apart.
SHANG TZE: I must thank you. Thank you for bringing me to your world and handing me this magic. Already it has imbued me with the power to learn your speech. Once I kill you…I will use the magic in that box to destroy and conquer this world, and others if I wish.
SHANG TZE: And while I lay waste to all that I see, and take what I will from the grip of a million dead men, your wench will be my personal entertainment. Till I grow bored of her and leave what’s left for my crew.
The Pirates cheer.
Close up of MIKE’S face; he’s obviously been brought to a breaking point and pushed way past it.
MIKE: Over…my…dead…
MIKE pushes SHANG TZE back and leaps in the air, sword in both hands, raised way above his head.
MIKE: BODY!
Page 16
MIKE slams the sword down, SHANG TZE blocking awkwardly, obviously not expecting such a fight. MIKE continues to assault him with a barrage of powerful blows. It seems MIKE has the advantage, but then SHANG TZE sees his opening and backhands him. MIKE is sent crashing to the floor. MEGAN and JACK both flinch. SHANG TZE is standing above MIKE. MIKE lies dazed on his side holding his jaw.
SHANG TZE: I give you this, pup. You have more fight in you than I expected.
Page 17
SHANG TZE turns and begins to walk back to the QFE. He places his hand upon it. Energy glows around him.
SHANG TZE: Perhaps I may spare your life, and merely cut off a limb or two if you were to tell me how to operate your Sorcerer’s Box. Its raw power surges through my bones.
SHANG TZE looks back over his shoulder at MIKE.
SHANG TZE: No? Oh well. I wasn’t going to spare you anyhow. I will just have to handle this myself.
SHANG TZE motions to two Pirates and they lift the QFE and bring it in the center of the circle. The two Pirates run back to their place. SHANG TZE raises both hands above his head. MIKE looks up, very surprised.
Page 18
Full splash page of SHANG TZE slamming his hands against the QFE. THE Quantum energy courses through his body.
Page 19
SHANG TZE removes his hands and stares down at them. The QFE is pumping a stream of pure Quantum energy into him.
SHANG TZE: The power! I never imagined.
A wave of his hand and the celing is decimated. Another wave and a portal opens and spouts a hellish flame. SHANG TZE smiles a twisted and evil grin. He points at one of his crew and the energy unmakes him into swirling energy. SHANG TZE laughs. Shot of SHANG TZE coursing with energy, and MIKE pushing himself up to his feet.
SHANG TZE: And now, pup, I shall send you to a thousand Hells.
SHANG TZE turns to face MIKE who is now standing there defiantly.
SHANG TZE: So, the pup faces his death as a man.
Page 20
MIKE kicks the scimitar up into his hand and hurls it through the Q.F.E. A large panel in the center of this page shows the Q.F.E. as it explodes with Quantum energy and it dissipates in a large circle. The energy dissipates throughout the mall. A shot of the time strewn warriors as they fade from existence as the energy passes through them.
Page 21
SHANG TZE looks around, enraged by his defeat and lunges for MIKE and his hands are mere inches from MIKE’S neck as he fades away and passes through MIKE harmless as a ghost.
SHANG TZE (fading): I…WILL…HAVE…MY…REVENGE…
Page 22
The field goes down and people rush in. Police, fire department, etc. MIKE unties MEGAN and they hug each other, then look at each other as the hug becomes an embrace. JACK looking at MIKE is smiling, then looks towards the doors and the rushing people. His face goes slack.
Page 23
Enter: MICHELLE. A splash page of MIKE & MEGAN in the foreground, silhouetted, and MICHELLE. She looks very surprised, but not angry.
MICHELLE: Mike?
Mike Manchester: Mall Security Intro & Issue #1 (original script)
Mike Manchester is a high-octane, action packed, adventure comic that incorporates all aspects of popular fiction, including but not limited to: kung fu movies, comic books, pulp novels, sci-fi TV shows, as well as historical references. The true goal of this comic is to present wild and outrageous stories where absolutely anything can possibly happen with the turn of a page. And these insane situations are based around a small town where the only excitement is the local mall. Specifically based around one mall security guard, MIKE MANCHESTER. A security guard who loves his job and his life. A life that revolves around an odd cast of characters. But there are two cast members that are the most important pieces of this puzzle. Michelle, who comes in a little later in the series, and Megan. Michelle is Mike’s girlfriend from high school. Megan was Mike’s fantasy girl, the one who got away. This love triangle is the ongoing main plot thread. MIKE MANCHESTER: MALL SECURITY is all about relationships, friendship, morality, monsters, kung fu action, aliens, sentient machines, and the madness that is the one-day sale.
Characters:
Mike Manchester - Marc Blucas. Tall (6’2”), very neat uniform, short hair, not a muscleman, but in shape.
Megan Meadows - Above avg. (5’9”), should length red hair, full figured, fashionable and trendy clothes.
Jack Jenkins - Tall (6’), messy, mid-length leather jacket, crazy t-shirts, hair a little long on top, and spiky.
Daryl - Average height (5’8”), a little heavy, out of shape, uniform a little messy.
Dr Loomis (Doctor Trapezoid) - Average (5’7’), wild hair, thin.
Dr Means (Rocket Queen) - Above average height (5’9”), Lara Means from Millenium.
Dr Ward (Master Blaster) - Jason Alexander. Short (5’3”), balding, a little pudgy.
Dexter – Average (5’7”), skinny, and slightly dorky. Charlie Kosmo.
Al - Average height (5’8”), very, very heavy, very messy, stains on his uniform.
Shoplifter – The kid from Can’t Hardly Wait that steals everything. Red hair, black hooded sweatshirt.
Upcoming characters:
Michelle Matthews - Average (5’4”), brown short hair, glasses (trendy, not dorky), khakis and sweaters.
Jennifer Jacobs – Alterna-chick. Hot topic kinda girl.
Sifu - Short (5’3”), old Chinese man, with a long white beard.
Bobby – George. Video Game Guru.
Tobey Tyler – Teen Out of Time. Corey Haim.
Frank Ford – The Most Famous Man Alive.
Rose Petals – Karaoke Diva
The All-Ska Squadron – Superhero ska band
Samuel Shepherd: Store Detective – A young Samuel L Jackson. (Omar Epps?)
***
Mike Manchester: Mall Security
Page 1-
CAPTION: Meet three scientists on their way to the West Coast in search of greener pastures (and greener bank accounts)…
We see a stretch of road that goes on for miles, either side complemented with endless rows of corn. The sun is huge in the sky. There is a beat up old car smoking on the side of the road. The hood is up and there are three people at the scene. DR LOOMIS, a thin dorky guy with wild hair and glasses, DR MEANS, an all-business woman with a suit-skirt and her hair tied back, and DR WARD, slightly overweight, balding and short. DR LOOMIS has his head tucked under the hood, DR MEANS is sitting on the back of the car (almost like she’s suntanning) looking bored, and DR WARD is pacing and yelling.
CAPTION: Dr. Ward…
DR WARD-I CAN NOT BELIEVE THIS! WHY DIDN’T WE JUST FLY TO CALIFORNIA?! WHY?!
CAPTION: Dr. Loomis…
DR LOOMIS-You said this would be safer. That the Company would trace the plane tickets.
DR WARD starts furiously wailing his fists around.
DR WARD-WE ARE ALL SCIENTISTS OF ADVANCED SCIENCES AND HAVE A COMBINED IQ OF 600 AND WE CAN’T FIX A DAMN ALTENATOR?!
DR LOOMIS-Actually it’s a radiator.
DR WARD-ARGH! WHATEVER IT’S CALLED! (To DR MEANS) How much cash do we have left?
CAPTION: And Dr. Means.
DR MEANS(bored)-After your Rutti-Tutti-Fresh-n-Fruity breakfast…eight dollars. Oh, and the Company credit cards have been cancelled.
DR WARD starts to wail his fists furiously again.
DR WARD- And how much farther to California?
DR MEANS(not paying much attention)- About four hundred miles.
DR WARD agains wails his fists around in fury, this time til he runs out of breath. DR.WARD spots a sign that reads ‘Morrison County Mega-Mall 3 Mi.’.
DR.WARD-Grab the gear. I have a plan.
Page 2
Exterior shot of a fairly grand mall. Not the mall of the future but it’s still a nice place to shop. The parking lot is congested. Zoom inside to see MIKE MANCHESTER in his full security guard gear walking along by the railing.
TITLE: MALL-IGNANT FORCES
Page 3
Mike stops in front of GIRLFRENZY, a trendy girls clothes store. Mike watches a girl with red hair; MEGAN. She is working in GIRLFRENZY and not noticing MIKE as he watches her. JACK walks up, punches MIKE, leans against the railing and looks in at MEGAN too. MIKE and JACK talk.
JACK: Hey Mikey ya loser, how’s Michelle?
MIKE: Wha? Oh, Jack, it’s you. How’s Jennifer?
JACK: (Looking over at MEGAN.) She’s fine. So you and Michelle getting along these days?
MIKE: I know what you’re trying to say, so stop being retarded.
JACK: Who me? I’m just asking about the well being of my good friend Michelle. Oh hey is that Megan, the girl of your dreams? Wowzers…
MIKE: You’re not funny. And for the record she’s not the girl of my dreams.
JACK: That’s not what you wrote in your diary in 5th grade. “Oh Megan my love, my red-haired angel, my…”
MIKE: I can’t believe you’re still quoting my diary. That used to embarrass me up until the end of High School but c’mon we’re twenty-three years old. Hasn’t it gotten old by now?
JACK clasps his hands together and bats his eyes.
JACK: “Oh Megan, if you’d only notice me, then we could be together forever!”
Page 4
MIKE’S not looking at JACK or acknowledging his taunts.
MIKE: Why don’t you go get a real job and stop hanging out at the mall all day?
JACK: You mean a real job like a mall security guard? I can wear a funny hat and pretend I’m important? Ooh, where do I sign up?
MEGAN sees MIKE and JACK and starts heading towards them. JACK looks at MEGAN, then MIKE.
JACK: (singing) Oh loverboy! And if he doesn’t answer? I say ‘Oh looverboyyyy!’ And if he still doesn’t answer? I simply say…’Bayyyyybee, my sweet bayyyybee’.
MIKE pushes JACK away. JACK is laughing as he walks away. MEGAN walks up to MIKE and is staring oddly at JACK.
JACK: SAY HI TO MICHELLE FOR ME LOSER! HI MEGAN!
MEGAN waves and looks slightly confused.
MEGAN: Hi.
MIKE: Hey. Sorry about that. You know how he is.
MEGAN: It’s ok. I always see him hanging around the mall being dumb. It’s good to see that you guys are still friends, though.
MIKE: We’re not friends. Jack is about as far from my friend as possible. Bane of my existence, yes. Friend, no. How are you doing though?
Page 5
A SHOPLIFTER runs between MIKE and MEGAN. The SHOPLIFTER knocks MEGAN to the ground as he rushes past. MIKE stunned helps MEGAN to her feet. DARYL calls over the walkie-talkie.
DARYL: (walkie-talkie) Mike! We got a shoplifter out of CD Barn!
MIKE glances over his shoulder and sees the SHOPLIFTER heading for the escalator.
MIKE: I got him Daryl. He’s going for the escalator.
MIKE looks up at MEGAN.
MEGAN: Go get him.
MIKE smiles and takes off after the SHOPLIFTER.
Page 6
The escalator. The SHOPLIFTER pushes his way down and MIKE slides down the center right behind him. MEGAN watches MIKE as he chases the SHOPLIFTER over and through many obstacles. Big shot of MIKE and SHOPLIFTER racing neck and neck from either sides of the mall. MIKE is in the foreground.
Page 7
The SHOPLIFTER flings a CD at MIKE and it’s just about to hit a lady in the head, when MIKE dives forward taking the hit. MIKE takes off after the SHOPLIFTER as he makes his way to the center of the mall. The SHOPLIFTER is heading right towards O.B. Ellis’ Dept Store, where there’s a big crowd and a sign that reads ‘One Day Sale’. MIKE spots the center fountain piece; a large art deco sculpture with revolving rings. Almost like an atom design.
Page 8
Big splash. MIKE leaps into the air, grabs a ring and swings around over the customers’ heads and flying tackles the SHOPLIFTER in front of O.B. Ellis’ Dept Store.
Page 9
DARYL runs over, huffing and puffing.
DARYL: Woohoo! That was awesome! What’s the score now, 38 for 38?
MIKE: 37 out of 38. Remember my first day?
DARYL: Oooooh yeah. How could I forget? That section is still being fixed up.
They bring the SHOPLIFTER on the elevator, and back to the Security HQ on the bottom level. There are hardly any people or stores on this level. Just a Post Office, and other misc stores. They bring him in to AL. AL is a large, jolly man sitting in front of rows of tv screens monitoring parts of the mall and parking lot.
MIKE/DARYL: Hey Al.
AL: Another bust for the Terminator!
DARYL and AL high-five. MIKE doesn’t seem to notice.
Page 10
MIKE begins filling out paperwork as AL puts the SHOPLIFTER in the corner seat they save for these occasions. MIKE notices MEGAN on one of the video monitors. DARYL sees where MIKE’S attention is.
DARYL: Hey, go for it. I’ll take care of this.
MIKE: No. I…
MIKE: You sure?
DARYL nods.
MIKE: Thanks D.
MIKE pats him on the shoulder and runs out to the elevator. As he does he passes the three scientists, DR LOOMIS, DR MEANS, and DR WARD all carrying big metal cases. They head into the men and women’s bathroom respectively. They’re looking around very suspiciously.
Page 11
MIKE darts out of the elevator and runs up to MEGAN outside of GIRLFRENZY.
MIKE: Phew…
MEGAN: You ok?
MIKE: Yeah, I’m just…uh…well…
MEGAN: Out of breath?
MIKE: (Smiling) Yeah.
MEGAN: That was pretty crazy. A whole lot of effort for a few stolen CDs.
MIKE: Well, it’s my job to protect the people in the mall, and their merchandise. That includes the owners of CD Barn.
MEGAN: I meant him. That was a lot of effort just to escape with the new Snoop Doggy Dogg CD.
MIKE: Oh…uhh…well…
Suddenly, a loud noise rumbles out. MIKE grabs the walkie-talkie.
MIKE: Daryl?! AL?! What’s going on?
DARYL: (V.O.) Mike? You won’t believe this. There are supervillians at the foodcourt.
MIKE: Daryl, stop screwing around…
Shot of DARYL yelling into walkie-talkie.
DARYL: Mike! There are supervillians at the foodcourt!!!
Page 12
Big shot of the former scientists at the food-court, DR LOOMIS, DR MEANS, and DR WARD. Now the three are dressed in makeshift supervillain costumes made from labcoats, goggles, loud shirts, and strange gadgets. DR LOOMIS is standing passively in the back next to a medium-sized, trapezoid-shaped engine. DR MEANS is floating in the air with a rocketpack on her back, thick mechanical gloves, and a similar designed helmet. DR WARD has a large laser connected to the back of his wrist with small cables running to a slim mechanical backpack. DR WARD is blasting tables and chairs with the laser on his arm. The shoppers are running for the exit.
DR WARD: Everyone be still! My name is Master Blaster! These are my associates Rocket Queen, and Dr.Trapezoid. There is no escape! Dr. Trapezoid has taken care of that! (Aside to LOOMIS) You did take care of that right?
DR LOOMIS: My Quantum Field Engine is working fine, it’s got the entire building encased in a Isolated Quantum Field that no one will be able to penetrate. (Patting his trapezoid-shaped machine) But I’m not sure we should be doing this…
Shot of the people as they stop short of the door. There is a yellow energy covering blocking their path. Outside shot of Mall covered by a massive yellow trapezoid made of energy. DR LOOMIS is nervous and protests very meekly.
Page 13
Back to MIKE and MEGAN.
MIKE: Sorry to do this again…
MEGAN politely nods and watches as MIKE runs off to the food-court. He meets DARYL by Nacho Horn. DEXTER the Nacho Horn employee is hiding behind the counter. People are fleeing in terror.
DEXTER: Mike? Daryl? What’s going on? I can’t possibly serve yummy crunchy Nachos under these conditions!
MIKE: Dexter, just lay low. We’ll handle this.
MIKE and DARYL stand crouched with the villains in the background. DR MEANS flies off with a bag.
MIKE: Daryl, you head back to the elevator and back to the security office. Call the police. While you do that I’ll provide a distraction.
DARYL: Mike are you sure? I mean, that thing that guy’s got looks pretty nasty.
MIKE: Don’t worry, I’m just gonna distract him for a few seconds so you can get downstairs. On three. 1,2,3! Go for it!
DARYL runs off, and MIKE gets up.
Page 14
MIKE stands in front of DR WARD.
DR WARD: Put all your valuables in the bag people!
MIKE: Sir, I’m going to have to escort you out of the mall.
DR WARD: What? A security guard? HAH! Escort this chump!
DR WARD takes a few shots at MIKE, which he nimbly dodges, leaping over tables, chairs, etc.
DEXTER: (from his hiding spot behind counter) Eeep! (faints)
Page 15
DR WARD gets furious that he can’t hit MIKE, and starts blasting everything in sight. MIKE runs along the tables and DR WARD blasts them as MIKE’S feet leave each one. DR LOOMIS looks very nervous.
DR MEANS: I’ll get him!
Page 16
DR MEANS flies by MIKE and tries to knock him off the tables. Instead MIKE ducks and grabs DR MEANS’ feet, just as DR WARD blasts the table MIKE was standing on.
MIKE: Going up!
After whipping around the foodcourt trying to shake him loose, she tries to pry him free by flying fast down the mall.
Page 17
Shot of DR MEANS and MIKE as they shoot up to the second level and almost into the railing. When that fails she attempts to kick him off. They go soaring coming very close to hitting people, signs, and stores.
MIKE: Ma’am, flying is prohibited in the mall!
Page 18
MIKE damages the pack, she loses control crashing into the fountain. MIKE leaps off at the last moment. DARYL comes out of the elevator and runs up.
DARYL: Mike! You ok? I called the cops and they’re on their way.
MIKE: Ok, let’s go help people find cover away from the food court.
Page 19
Jack is hiding behind some tables while DR WARD is yelling at DR LOOMIS.
DR WARD: Go get the bag of money!
DR LOOMIS: No, this isn’t right.
DR WARD: WHAT?!? ISN’T RIGHT?!? I’LL GIVE YOU…
JACK runs in from seemingly nowhere and tackles DR WARD. In the struggle DR WARD fires a few stray blasts. One blast blows up the soda dispenser at Nacho Horn just as DEXTER comes to, then he faints again.
DEXTER: MOMMY!
Another blast just misses DR LOOMIS as he dives clear. The blast instead hits his Quantum-Field-Engine, sending it flying past Nacho Horn (and DEXTER) in the back towards the doors to the inside of the mall. The Q-F-E starts to glow ominously.
JACK and DR WARD look at each other, still grappling.
DR WARD: (to JACK) YOU FOOL! DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU HAVE DONE?!
JACK: No, what?
DR WARD: (to DR LOOMIS) What did he do?
DR LOOMIS: I don’t know, but it’s not good.
Shot of the Q-F-E glowing even brighter.
Page 20
JACK, distracted for a moment, loosens his grip and DR WARD pushes him off. JACK falls back and smacks his head. They both get up to their feet, although JACK is a little bit disoriented. MIKE runs up as DR WARD readies a blast.
MIKE: JACK, get down!
MIKE runs and pushes JACK out of the way. The blast grazes MIKE’S arm.
Page 21
JACK, rubbing the back of his head, looks down at MIKE holding his wounded arm.
JACK: What the Hell did you do that for? I had in under control. Gotta always run in and save the day huh?
MIKE: Just shut up and help me up.
DR WARD: (coming closer) Hey.
JACK: No. Help your damn self up. I didn’t need your help, or ask for it. This is my mall and I’ll…
MIKE pushes himself up to his feet, then gets in JACK’S face.
MIKE: Your mall?! Just because you waste more time here than anyone doesn’t make it your mall! I’m so sick and tired of your macho tough guy bullcrap!
DR WARD: (closer) Hey!
JACK: Look who’s talking Mr. Hero-of-the-mall! You’re a security guard Mike! Not a cop, or some secret agent, or a superhero! A security guard! That’s it!
MIKE: And what are you? A lowlife waste of space, who makes fun of other people so his own pathetic existence doesn’t look so GOD DAMN PATHETIC for a few minutes!
DR WARD: HEY!
Page 22
MIKE and JACK both look over at him. There is fury in their eyes.
MIKE&JACK: WHAT?!
JACK kicks him in the stomach and when he bends over MIKE uppercuts him, knocking him out flat.
MIKE and JACK stare each other down. DARYL runs up.
DARYL: That was awesome! What a plan! Make him think you were fighting then take him out when he least expected it.
MIKE and JACK still staring each other down.
JACK: Yeah…
MIKE: Great plan.
Page 23
MEGAN runs up and MIKE’S anger is gone.
MEGAN: Mike, the police are stuck outside the energy covering the mall. No one can get in or out.
MIKE turns to LOOMIS.
MIKE: How do we shut it off?
DR LOOMIS: We might not be able to. And we might have a bigger problem. Look.
The Q-F-E is generating a large portal of energy.
Page 24
Out of the portal of energy step an Asian pirate, a Viking, a gunslinger, and a knight in partial chainmail. Small horizontal frame of MIKE and JACK’S heads looking ahead with LOOMIS, DARYL, MEGAN, and a fainting DEXTER in the background.
MIKE: This’ll be interesting. You ready for this?
JACK: Come get some.
Characters:
Mike Manchester - Marc Blucas. Tall (6’2”), very neat uniform, short hair, not a muscleman, but in shape.
Megan Meadows - Above avg. (5’9”), should length red hair, full figured, fashionable and trendy clothes.
Jack Jenkins - Tall (6’), messy, mid-length leather jacket, crazy t-shirts, hair a little long on top, and spiky.
Daryl - Average height (5’8”), a little heavy, out of shape, uniform a little messy.
Dr Loomis (Doctor Trapezoid) - Average (5’7’), wild hair, thin.
Dr Means (Rocket Queen) - Above average height (5’9”), Lara Means from Millenium.
Dr Ward (Master Blaster) - Jason Alexander. Short (5’3”), balding, a little pudgy.
Dexter – Average (5’7”), skinny, and slightly dorky. Charlie Kosmo.
Al - Average height (5’8”), very, very heavy, very messy, stains on his uniform.
Shoplifter – The kid from Can’t Hardly Wait that steals everything. Red hair, black hooded sweatshirt.
Upcoming characters:
Michelle Matthews - Average (5’4”), brown short hair, glasses (trendy, not dorky), khakis and sweaters.
Jennifer Jacobs – Alterna-chick. Hot topic kinda girl.
Sifu - Short (5’3”), old Chinese man, with a long white beard.
Bobby – George. Video Game Guru.
Tobey Tyler – Teen Out of Time. Corey Haim.
Frank Ford – The Most Famous Man Alive.
Rose Petals – Karaoke Diva
The All-Ska Squadron – Superhero ska band
Samuel Shepherd: Store Detective – A young Samuel L Jackson. (Omar Epps?)
***
Mike Manchester: Mall Security
Page 1-
CAPTION: Meet three scientists on their way to the West Coast in search of greener pastures (and greener bank accounts)…
We see a stretch of road that goes on for miles, either side complemented with endless rows of corn. The sun is huge in the sky. There is a beat up old car smoking on the side of the road. The hood is up and there are three people at the scene. DR LOOMIS, a thin dorky guy with wild hair and glasses, DR MEANS, an all-business woman with a suit-skirt and her hair tied back, and DR WARD, slightly overweight, balding and short. DR LOOMIS has his head tucked under the hood, DR MEANS is sitting on the back of the car (almost like she’s suntanning) looking bored, and DR WARD is pacing and yelling.
CAPTION: Dr. Ward…
DR WARD-I CAN NOT BELIEVE THIS! WHY DIDN’T WE JUST FLY TO CALIFORNIA?! WHY?!
CAPTION: Dr. Loomis…
DR LOOMIS-You said this would be safer. That the Company would trace the plane tickets.
DR WARD starts furiously wailing his fists around.
DR WARD-WE ARE ALL SCIENTISTS OF ADVANCED SCIENCES AND HAVE A COMBINED IQ OF 600 AND WE CAN’T FIX A DAMN ALTENATOR?!
DR LOOMIS-Actually it’s a radiator.
DR WARD-ARGH! WHATEVER IT’S CALLED! (To DR MEANS) How much cash do we have left?
CAPTION: And Dr. Means.
DR MEANS(bored)-After your Rutti-Tutti-Fresh-n-Fruity breakfast…eight dollars. Oh, and the Company credit cards have been cancelled.
DR WARD starts to wail his fists furiously again.
DR WARD- And how much farther to California?
DR MEANS(not paying much attention)- About four hundred miles.
DR WARD agains wails his fists around in fury, this time til he runs out of breath. DR.WARD spots a sign that reads ‘Morrison County Mega-Mall 3 Mi.’.
DR.WARD-Grab the gear. I have a plan.
Page 2
Exterior shot of a fairly grand mall. Not the mall of the future but it’s still a nice place to shop. The parking lot is congested. Zoom inside to see MIKE MANCHESTER in his full security guard gear walking along by the railing.
TITLE: MALL-IGNANT FORCES
Page 3
Mike stops in front of GIRLFRENZY, a trendy girls clothes store. Mike watches a girl with red hair; MEGAN. She is working in GIRLFRENZY and not noticing MIKE as he watches her. JACK walks up, punches MIKE, leans against the railing and looks in at MEGAN too. MIKE and JACK talk.
JACK: Hey Mikey ya loser, how’s Michelle?
MIKE: Wha? Oh, Jack, it’s you. How’s Jennifer?
JACK: (Looking over at MEGAN.) She’s fine. So you and Michelle getting along these days?
MIKE: I know what you’re trying to say, so stop being retarded.
JACK: Who me? I’m just asking about the well being of my good friend Michelle. Oh hey is that Megan, the girl of your dreams? Wowzers…
MIKE: You’re not funny. And for the record she’s not the girl of my dreams.
JACK: That’s not what you wrote in your diary in 5th grade. “Oh Megan my love, my red-haired angel, my…”
MIKE: I can’t believe you’re still quoting my diary. That used to embarrass me up until the end of High School but c’mon we’re twenty-three years old. Hasn’t it gotten old by now?
JACK clasps his hands together and bats his eyes.
JACK: “Oh Megan, if you’d only notice me, then we could be together forever!”
Page 4
MIKE’S not looking at JACK or acknowledging his taunts.
MIKE: Why don’t you go get a real job and stop hanging out at the mall all day?
JACK: You mean a real job like a mall security guard? I can wear a funny hat and pretend I’m important? Ooh, where do I sign up?
MEGAN sees MIKE and JACK and starts heading towards them. JACK looks at MEGAN, then MIKE.
JACK: (singing) Oh loverboy! And if he doesn’t answer? I say ‘Oh looverboyyyy!’ And if he still doesn’t answer? I simply say…’Bayyyyybee, my sweet bayyyybee’.
MIKE pushes JACK away. JACK is laughing as he walks away. MEGAN walks up to MIKE and is staring oddly at JACK.
JACK: SAY HI TO MICHELLE FOR ME LOSER! HI MEGAN!
MEGAN waves and looks slightly confused.
MEGAN: Hi.
MIKE: Hey. Sorry about that. You know how he is.
MEGAN: It’s ok. I always see him hanging around the mall being dumb. It’s good to see that you guys are still friends, though.
MIKE: We’re not friends. Jack is about as far from my friend as possible. Bane of my existence, yes. Friend, no. How are you doing though?
Page 5
A SHOPLIFTER runs between MIKE and MEGAN. The SHOPLIFTER knocks MEGAN to the ground as he rushes past. MIKE stunned helps MEGAN to her feet. DARYL calls over the walkie-talkie.
DARYL: (walkie-talkie) Mike! We got a shoplifter out of CD Barn!
MIKE glances over his shoulder and sees the SHOPLIFTER heading for the escalator.
MIKE: I got him Daryl. He’s going for the escalator.
MIKE looks up at MEGAN.
MEGAN: Go get him.
MIKE smiles and takes off after the SHOPLIFTER.
Page 6
The escalator. The SHOPLIFTER pushes his way down and MIKE slides down the center right behind him. MEGAN watches MIKE as he chases the SHOPLIFTER over and through many obstacles. Big shot of MIKE and SHOPLIFTER racing neck and neck from either sides of the mall. MIKE is in the foreground.
Page 7
The SHOPLIFTER flings a CD at MIKE and it’s just about to hit a lady in the head, when MIKE dives forward taking the hit. MIKE takes off after the SHOPLIFTER as he makes his way to the center of the mall. The SHOPLIFTER is heading right towards O.B. Ellis’ Dept Store, where there’s a big crowd and a sign that reads ‘One Day Sale’. MIKE spots the center fountain piece; a large art deco sculpture with revolving rings. Almost like an atom design.
Page 8
Big splash. MIKE leaps into the air, grabs a ring and swings around over the customers’ heads and flying tackles the SHOPLIFTER in front of O.B. Ellis’ Dept Store.
Page 9
DARYL runs over, huffing and puffing.
DARYL: Woohoo! That was awesome! What’s the score now, 38 for 38?
MIKE: 37 out of 38. Remember my first day?
DARYL: Oooooh yeah. How could I forget? That section is still being fixed up.
They bring the SHOPLIFTER on the elevator, and back to the Security HQ on the bottom level. There are hardly any people or stores on this level. Just a Post Office, and other misc stores. They bring him in to AL. AL is a large, jolly man sitting in front of rows of tv screens monitoring parts of the mall and parking lot.
MIKE/DARYL: Hey Al.
AL: Another bust for the Terminator!
DARYL and AL high-five. MIKE doesn’t seem to notice.
Page 10
MIKE begins filling out paperwork as AL puts the SHOPLIFTER in the corner seat they save for these occasions. MIKE notices MEGAN on one of the video monitors. DARYL sees where MIKE’S attention is.
DARYL: Hey, go for it. I’ll take care of this.
MIKE: No. I…
MIKE: You sure?
DARYL nods.
MIKE: Thanks D.
MIKE pats him on the shoulder and runs out to the elevator. As he does he passes the three scientists, DR LOOMIS, DR MEANS, and DR WARD all carrying big metal cases. They head into the men and women’s bathroom respectively. They’re looking around very suspiciously.
Page 11
MIKE darts out of the elevator and runs up to MEGAN outside of GIRLFRENZY.
MIKE: Phew…
MEGAN: You ok?
MIKE: Yeah, I’m just…uh…well…
MEGAN: Out of breath?
MIKE: (Smiling) Yeah.
MEGAN: That was pretty crazy. A whole lot of effort for a few stolen CDs.
MIKE: Well, it’s my job to protect the people in the mall, and their merchandise. That includes the owners of CD Barn.
MEGAN: I meant him. That was a lot of effort just to escape with the new Snoop Doggy Dogg CD.
MIKE: Oh…uhh…well…
Suddenly, a loud noise rumbles out. MIKE grabs the walkie-talkie.
MIKE: Daryl?! AL?! What’s going on?
DARYL: (V.O.) Mike? You won’t believe this. There are supervillians at the foodcourt.
MIKE: Daryl, stop screwing around…
Shot of DARYL yelling into walkie-talkie.
DARYL: Mike! There are supervillians at the foodcourt!!!
Page 12
Big shot of the former scientists at the food-court, DR LOOMIS, DR MEANS, and DR WARD. Now the three are dressed in makeshift supervillain costumes made from labcoats, goggles, loud shirts, and strange gadgets. DR LOOMIS is standing passively in the back next to a medium-sized, trapezoid-shaped engine. DR MEANS is floating in the air with a rocketpack on her back, thick mechanical gloves, and a similar designed helmet. DR WARD has a large laser connected to the back of his wrist with small cables running to a slim mechanical backpack. DR WARD is blasting tables and chairs with the laser on his arm. The shoppers are running for the exit.
DR WARD: Everyone be still! My name is Master Blaster! These are my associates Rocket Queen, and Dr.Trapezoid. There is no escape! Dr. Trapezoid has taken care of that! (Aside to LOOMIS) You did take care of that right?
DR LOOMIS: My Quantum Field Engine is working fine, it’s got the entire building encased in a Isolated Quantum Field that no one will be able to penetrate. (Patting his trapezoid-shaped machine) But I’m not sure we should be doing this…
Shot of the people as they stop short of the door. There is a yellow energy covering blocking their path. Outside shot of Mall covered by a massive yellow trapezoid made of energy. DR LOOMIS is nervous and protests very meekly.
Page 13
Back to MIKE and MEGAN.
MIKE: Sorry to do this again…
MEGAN politely nods and watches as MIKE runs off to the food-court. He meets DARYL by Nacho Horn. DEXTER the Nacho Horn employee is hiding behind the counter. People are fleeing in terror.
DEXTER: Mike? Daryl? What’s going on? I can’t possibly serve yummy crunchy Nachos under these conditions!
MIKE: Dexter, just lay low. We’ll handle this.
MIKE and DARYL stand crouched with the villains in the background. DR MEANS flies off with a bag.
MIKE: Daryl, you head back to the elevator and back to the security office. Call the police. While you do that I’ll provide a distraction.
DARYL: Mike are you sure? I mean, that thing that guy’s got looks pretty nasty.
MIKE: Don’t worry, I’m just gonna distract him for a few seconds so you can get downstairs. On three. 1,2,3! Go for it!
DARYL runs off, and MIKE gets up.
Page 14
MIKE stands in front of DR WARD.
DR WARD: Put all your valuables in the bag people!
MIKE: Sir, I’m going to have to escort you out of the mall.
DR WARD: What? A security guard? HAH! Escort this chump!
DR WARD takes a few shots at MIKE, which he nimbly dodges, leaping over tables, chairs, etc.
DEXTER: (from his hiding spot behind counter) Eeep! (faints)
Page 15
DR WARD gets furious that he can’t hit MIKE, and starts blasting everything in sight. MIKE runs along the tables and DR WARD blasts them as MIKE’S feet leave each one. DR LOOMIS looks very nervous.
DR MEANS: I’ll get him!
Page 16
DR MEANS flies by MIKE and tries to knock him off the tables. Instead MIKE ducks and grabs DR MEANS’ feet, just as DR WARD blasts the table MIKE was standing on.
MIKE: Going up!
After whipping around the foodcourt trying to shake him loose, she tries to pry him free by flying fast down the mall.
Page 17
Shot of DR MEANS and MIKE as they shoot up to the second level and almost into the railing. When that fails she attempts to kick him off. They go soaring coming very close to hitting people, signs, and stores.
MIKE: Ma’am, flying is prohibited in the mall!
Page 18
MIKE damages the pack, she loses control crashing into the fountain. MIKE leaps off at the last moment. DARYL comes out of the elevator and runs up.
DARYL: Mike! You ok? I called the cops and they’re on their way.
MIKE: Ok, let’s go help people find cover away from the food court.
Page 19
Jack is hiding behind some tables while DR WARD is yelling at DR LOOMIS.
DR WARD: Go get the bag of money!
DR LOOMIS: No, this isn’t right.
DR WARD: WHAT?!? ISN’T RIGHT?!? I’LL GIVE YOU…
JACK runs in from seemingly nowhere and tackles DR WARD. In the struggle DR WARD fires a few stray blasts. One blast blows up the soda dispenser at Nacho Horn just as DEXTER comes to, then he faints again.
DEXTER: MOMMY!
Another blast just misses DR LOOMIS as he dives clear. The blast instead hits his Quantum-Field-Engine, sending it flying past Nacho Horn (and DEXTER) in the back towards the doors to the inside of the mall. The Q-F-E starts to glow ominously.
JACK and DR WARD look at each other, still grappling.
DR WARD: (to JACK) YOU FOOL! DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU HAVE DONE?!
JACK: No, what?
DR WARD: (to DR LOOMIS) What did he do?
DR LOOMIS: I don’t know, but it’s not good.
Shot of the Q-F-E glowing even brighter.
Page 20
JACK, distracted for a moment, loosens his grip and DR WARD pushes him off. JACK falls back and smacks his head. They both get up to their feet, although JACK is a little bit disoriented. MIKE runs up as DR WARD readies a blast.
MIKE: JACK, get down!
MIKE runs and pushes JACK out of the way. The blast grazes MIKE’S arm.
Page 21
JACK, rubbing the back of his head, looks down at MIKE holding his wounded arm.
JACK: What the Hell did you do that for? I had in under control. Gotta always run in and save the day huh?
MIKE: Just shut up and help me up.
DR WARD: (coming closer) Hey.
JACK: No. Help your damn self up. I didn’t need your help, or ask for it. This is my mall and I’ll…
MIKE pushes himself up to his feet, then gets in JACK’S face.
MIKE: Your mall?! Just because you waste more time here than anyone doesn’t make it your mall! I’m so sick and tired of your macho tough guy bullcrap!
DR WARD: (closer) Hey!
JACK: Look who’s talking Mr. Hero-of-the-mall! You’re a security guard Mike! Not a cop, or some secret agent, or a superhero! A security guard! That’s it!
MIKE: And what are you? A lowlife waste of space, who makes fun of other people so his own pathetic existence doesn’t look so GOD DAMN PATHETIC for a few minutes!
DR WARD: HEY!
Page 22
MIKE and JACK both look over at him. There is fury in their eyes.
MIKE&JACK: WHAT?!
JACK kicks him in the stomach and when he bends over MIKE uppercuts him, knocking him out flat.
MIKE and JACK stare each other down. DARYL runs up.
DARYL: That was awesome! What a plan! Make him think you were fighting then take him out when he least expected it.
MIKE and JACK still staring each other down.
JACK: Yeah…
MIKE: Great plan.
Page 23
MEGAN runs up and MIKE’S anger is gone.
MEGAN: Mike, the police are stuck outside the energy covering the mall. No one can get in or out.
MIKE turns to LOOMIS.
MIKE: How do we shut it off?
DR LOOMIS: We might not be able to. And we might have a bigger problem. Look.
The Q-F-E is generating a large portal of energy.
Page 24
Out of the portal of energy step an Asian pirate, a Viking, a gunslinger, and a knight in partial chainmail. Small horizontal frame of MIKE and JACK’S heads looking ahead with LOOMIS, DARYL, MEGAN, and a fainting DEXTER in the background.
MIKE: This’ll be interesting. You ready for this?
JACK: Come get some.
Saturday, February 28, 2009
Jet Black #2
PAGE 1
It’s important for the layout that the chapter prior to this have an even number of pages. Pages 2&3 and 4&5 should be across from each other.
The top three panels are small and run along the top. The following panels are page-wide shots.
Panel 1- Close up of an arcane symbol carved in ancient stone.
Panel 2- Pull back and we see the symbol is carved into a headstone that is lying on the ground. There is some loose dirt around. It’s dusk. The sun is just about setting, casting long shadows of some people and other headstones. A dead thug wearing a dirty suit with rolled up sleeves lies bleeding from a large cut nearby. There is a shovel somewhere nearby, or just barely in the panel.
CAPTION: JAPAN. 2007.
(From here on the captions can be distinguished as thoughts by either italics, different font, quotes, etc.)
Panel 3- Close up of the right side of JET BLACK’S face. We see only his eye, which is narrowed and determined, and his cheek that has a fresh cut across it and blood is just beginning to drop from it. On the right side in the background we see the tombstone and empty grave.
Panel 4- Wide shot of JET BLACK from about the chest up as he stands in a fighting position. (See me for a picture for visual reference, otherwise picture Jet Li.) He looks a little worn, and sliced up. A black shirt hangs from him in tatters, barely covering the multiple sword slashes that are bleeding. It doesn’t look too serious, but enough for dramatic effect. In the background, all around him, are fleshy zombies (think of the Imhotep from the Mummy before he fully regenerated) in partial samurai armor, and holding swords.
CAPTION: Somedays…it sucks being a man of honor.
CAPTION: Sure, it all sounds good on paper…’my word is my bond’…fulfilling blood debts…Bushido...’the way of the warrior’ and all that.
Panel 5- Flip the scene, and now we’re looking over JET as he stands before a massive samurai zombie in full samurai armor. He is wielding a massively long sword that has just a hint of blood on it. The sun rests just above the horizon.
CAPTION: But Kaneshiro never said anything about sword swinging zombies…
CAPTION: Serves me right…should never have let myself owe anything to the Yakuza.
TITLE: JET BLACK - HONORBOUND
CREDITS:
PAGE 2
Three page wide panels. The panels of KANESHIRO and JET should be taller than the JET & zombie panels, but not by that much. Just enough to give it that widescreen feel. On the following pages make the panels with JET & the zombies get taller as the restaurant panels get smaller, to give the feeling that the tension is mounting and the serious action is about to begin.
Panel 1- There will be a few panels alternating with the standoff between JET and the samurai zombies which will help explain the backstory before the big fight scene. Far shot of a well lit Japanese styled restaurant (I’ll see if I can get photo reference). It’s mid-afternoon and the sunlight is pouring in. There are two men in black suits sitting at a large table. KANESHIRO has his back to the wall. Across from him sits JET in a nice suit. There are four or so thugs in suits surrounding KANESHIRO looking for suspicious activity, even though there is no one sitting at the other tables.
KANESHIRO: Jet. You know we, like our fathers, are men of honor.
JET: Even though they did try to kill each other time and again.
KANESHIRO: Just as we have.
KANESHIRO: So you know I wouldn’t have called in this favor were it not necessary.
Panel 2- JET, from a side view facing the right side of the page, is still standing rigidly in his fighting stance as he stares ahead. In the background are two samurai zombies spaced evenly apart. One on either side of him.
Panel 3- Zoom in on the restaurant scene some. Enough so we get a decent look at everyone. KANESHIRO is a mean looking badass. He’s wearing sunglasses, has semi-long black hair, and has a fairly noticeable scar across his cheek, just below his eye.
JET: I didn’t think you’d be cashing that in for awhile.
KANESHIRO: I wouldn’t have…except…we’re running out of time.
KANESHIRO: A couple of hours out of the city, there’s a graveyard. I just need you to retrieve something for me.
PAGE 3
Panel 1- Spin the restaurant scene slightly so we get a better look at JET. He looks wary of KANESHIRO’S proposal. He’s wearing sunglasses as well.
JET: Doesn’t sound too hard.
JET: What’s the grab?
KANESHIRO: It’s a samurai sword, buried with the body of an ancient samurai warrior.
Panel 2- This is the extension of Page 2, Panel 2. Facing the left of the page is the main undead samurai warrior with his sword raised. It’s an impressive and long samurai sword, and feel free to add any embellishments to the sword that you want.
Panel 3- Back to the restaurant. Medium shot of KANESHIRO and JET. JET looks almost uninterested.
KANESHIRO: I’ll have two of my men go with you to dig it up.
JET: Why me?
KANESHIRO: Someone else will be looking for it. And he’ll have his hands on it by nightfall.
KANESHIRO: I need you to grab it before he does, and get it to me by sundown.
JET: Lucky for you I was killing some time in Tokyo then.
PAGE 4
Panel 1- Tight shot of KANESHIRO as he takes off his sunglasses. He looks deadly serious.
KANESHIRO: This is serious Jet. This goes beyond you and me. This is big league stuff.
KANESHIRO: That’s why I’m calling in your debt to me.
KANESHIRO: You do this…we’re even. Blank slate.
Panel 2- Same as Page 2, Panel 2 except now JET is charging forward. Some speed lines in the background.
Panel 3- Tight shot of JET. He’s starting to realize the seriousness of the situation. He starts to stand.
JET: Fine. But I’m only doing this to clear things between us.
JET: I can’t pass up such an easy out.
PAGE 5
Panel 1- JET is walking away from the table. KANESHIRO is putting his sunglasses back on.
KANESHIRO: Godspeed.
Panel 2- Same shot as Page 3, Panel 2. This is the extension of Page 4, Panel 2. Facing the left of the page is the main undead samurai warrior with his sword raised.
Panel 3- KANESHIRO looks thoughtfully out the window. One of his men leans in to talk to him.
TAKAGAWA: Kaneshiro, do you think it’s a good idea sending him?
KANESHIRO: That sword will be safer in his hands than any of yours.
KANESHIRO: He’ll bring it back here as well. If nothing else, he is a man of his word.
PAGE 6
This is where the insanity begins. Now we need some insane action. Instead of all the rectangle shaped panels before, go crazy here. Make as many diagonal edges as possible, to give it the feeling of sword slashes. Don’t forget it’s just about sunset and everything should cast long shadows.
Panel 1- JET stops short as the zombie on his left slices its sword forward. The sword comes straight down the middle of the zombie on his right slicing it in two.
Panel 2- JET snags the sword from the zombie that’s been split in two, ripping it’s rotting hand off as he does. As he does the other zombie raises its sword for another strike.
Panel 3- JET slices right through the zombie’s waist, cutting its torso in half. The top half should be in the process of sliding off.
Panel 4- JET spins around as another zombie lunges its sword forward. JET’S sword lops the zombie’s head off in mid spin. Its head goes flying off.
Panel 5- This panel should be the central shot. The main armored zombie sits, unmoving as the sun sets off in the horizon.
PAGE 7
Similar hectic panel layout as Page 6.
Panel 1- JET launches the sword off to the right side of the page.
Panel 2- A zombie gets pinned against a tree as JET’S sword slams into it.
Panel 3- JET does a jumping spin kick and smacks a zombie’s head right off its shoulders and into another zombie knocking it off balance right before it was about to strike.
Panel 4- JET brings his leg crashing down into the off balance zombie from the panel before, cracking its spine.
Panel 5- Tight shot of JET from the waist up as he turns to face the main zombie.
Panel 6- Close up shot of JET as the tip of a sword rips through his shoulder.
PAGE 8
This can have just a regular panel layout. Nothing too crazy though. Something calm.
Panel 1- JET falls to one knee and grabs his shoulder. The main zombie stands behind him, fresh blood dripping from its sword.
CAPTION: Being honorable really isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.
CAPTION: In fact…it hurts.
CAPTION: A lot.
Panel 2- Tight shot as JET begins to look up. He’s facing away from the samurai zombie and towards the setting sun. Just behind him the zombie is about to deliver its killing blow.
CAPTION: I can’t die like this!
CAPTION: Not for Kaneshiro!
Panel 3- Shot from behind and off to the side of the main zombie so we can see the zombie about to strike, JET struggling through the pain and both of them are facing the sun as it sets in the background.
CAPTION: Sorry Kaneshiro, looks like I won’t be able to get the sword to you before sunset.
Panel 4- Dusk has fallen. Close up of JET as he starts to look over his wounded shoulder.
CAPTION: He’s certainly taking his time with this killing blow here…
PAGE 9
Panel 1- JET struggles to stand. He looks to be in a mixed state of pain/disbelief.
CAPTION: What the hell?
Panel 2- JET’S POV. We see the samurai zombie as he sheathes the sword. He has backed up about ten feet. The headstone begins to glow in the background.
CAPTION: What’s he up to now…?
Panel 3- Tight shot of the headstone with the arcane symbol. It’s glowing ominously.
Panel 4- A demonic (something Japanese) image starts to appear around the samurai zombie.
Panel 5- The samurai zombie begins to fade away as if his image was being pulled away from us at superspeed. All blurry-like.
PAGE 10
Panel 1- JET scoops up a sword with his good hand and dives forward at the image.
CAPTION: Somedays…it’s just not worth being a man of honor.
Panel 2- Slight energy crackles and dissipates, and the samurai zombie and JET are both gone, as is the demonic image. The remaining pieces of zombies fall dead once again.
CAPTION: But I just can’t seem to help it…maybe it’s in the blood.
Panel 3- The same scene as Panel 2 but now all is silent. Nothing is moving, and all energy traces are gone.
Panel 4- Same panel as Panel 3, but now some energy is appearing, crackling in mid-air where JET disappeared.
Panel 5- Same as the above panels but now there is a gaping hole torn through reality. We can just see inside as JET dives out backwards, cut up, blood splattered, with sliced off undead demonic arms hanging off him.
CAPTION: It’s like I said before…
Panel 6- JET is walking away from KANESHIRO’S table in the restaurant. He looks very ragged, and beat up. The sword is stabbed in the middle of the table where JET stuck it.
JET: Next time Kaneshiro...
CAPTION: Somedays…it sucks being a man of honor.
It’s important for the layout that the chapter prior to this have an even number of pages. Pages 2&3 and 4&5 should be across from each other.
The top three panels are small and run along the top. The following panels are page-wide shots.
Panel 1- Close up of an arcane symbol carved in ancient stone.
Panel 2- Pull back and we see the symbol is carved into a headstone that is lying on the ground. There is some loose dirt around. It’s dusk. The sun is just about setting, casting long shadows of some people and other headstones. A dead thug wearing a dirty suit with rolled up sleeves lies bleeding from a large cut nearby. There is a shovel somewhere nearby, or just barely in the panel.
CAPTION: JAPAN. 2007.
(From here on the captions can be distinguished as thoughts by either italics, different font, quotes, etc.)
Panel 3- Close up of the right side of JET BLACK’S face. We see only his eye, which is narrowed and determined, and his cheek that has a fresh cut across it and blood is just beginning to drop from it. On the right side in the background we see the tombstone and empty grave.
Panel 4- Wide shot of JET BLACK from about the chest up as he stands in a fighting position. (See me for a picture for visual reference, otherwise picture Jet Li.) He looks a little worn, and sliced up. A black shirt hangs from him in tatters, barely covering the multiple sword slashes that are bleeding. It doesn’t look too serious, but enough for dramatic effect. In the background, all around him, are fleshy zombies (think of the Imhotep from the Mummy before he fully regenerated) in partial samurai armor, and holding swords.
CAPTION: Somedays…it sucks being a man of honor.
CAPTION: Sure, it all sounds good on paper…’my word is my bond’…fulfilling blood debts…Bushido...’the way of the warrior’ and all that.
Panel 5- Flip the scene, and now we’re looking over JET as he stands before a massive samurai zombie in full samurai armor. He is wielding a massively long sword that has just a hint of blood on it. The sun rests just above the horizon.
CAPTION: But Kaneshiro never said anything about sword swinging zombies…
CAPTION: Serves me right…should never have let myself owe anything to the Yakuza.
TITLE: JET BLACK - HONORBOUND
CREDITS:
PAGE 2
Three page wide panels. The panels of KANESHIRO and JET should be taller than the JET & zombie panels, but not by that much. Just enough to give it that widescreen feel. On the following pages make the panels with JET & the zombies get taller as the restaurant panels get smaller, to give the feeling that the tension is mounting and the serious action is about to begin.
Panel 1- There will be a few panels alternating with the standoff between JET and the samurai zombies which will help explain the backstory before the big fight scene. Far shot of a well lit Japanese styled restaurant (I’ll see if I can get photo reference). It’s mid-afternoon and the sunlight is pouring in. There are two men in black suits sitting at a large table. KANESHIRO has his back to the wall. Across from him sits JET in a nice suit. There are four or so thugs in suits surrounding KANESHIRO looking for suspicious activity, even though there is no one sitting at the other tables.
KANESHIRO: Jet. You know we, like our fathers, are men of honor.
JET: Even though they did try to kill each other time and again.
KANESHIRO: Just as we have.
KANESHIRO: So you know I wouldn’t have called in this favor were it not necessary.
Panel 2- JET, from a side view facing the right side of the page, is still standing rigidly in his fighting stance as he stares ahead. In the background are two samurai zombies spaced evenly apart. One on either side of him.
Panel 3- Zoom in on the restaurant scene some. Enough so we get a decent look at everyone. KANESHIRO is a mean looking badass. He’s wearing sunglasses, has semi-long black hair, and has a fairly noticeable scar across his cheek, just below his eye.
JET: I didn’t think you’d be cashing that in for awhile.
KANESHIRO: I wouldn’t have…except…we’re running out of time.
KANESHIRO: A couple of hours out of the city, there’s a graveyard. I just need you to retrieve something for me.
PAGE 3
Panel 1- Spin the restaurant scene slightly so we get a better look at JET. He looks wary of KANESHIRO’S proposal. He’s wearing sunglasses as well.
JET: Doesn’t sound too hard.
JET: What’s the grab?
KANESHIRO: It’s a samurai sword, buried with the body of an ancient samurai warrior.
Panel 2- This is the extension of Page 2, Panel 2. Facing the left of the page is the main undead samurai warrior with his sword raised. It’s an impressive and long samurai sword, and feel free to add any embellishments to the sword that you want.
Panel 3- Back to the restaurant. Medium shot of KANESHIRO and JET. JET looks almost uninterested.
KANESHIRO: I’ll have two of my men go with you to dig it up.
JET: Why me?
KANESHIRO: Someone else will be looking for it. And he’ll have his hands on it by nightfall.
KANESHIRO: I need you to grab it before he does, and get it to me by sundown.
JET: Lucky for you I was killing some time in Tokyo then.
PAGE 4
Panel 1- Tight shot of KANESHIRO as he takes off his sunglasses. He looks deadly serious.
KANESHIRO: This is serious Jet. This goes beyond you and me. This is big league stuff.
KANESHIRO: That’s why I’m calling in your debt to me.
KANESHIRO: You do this…we’re even. Blank slate.
Panel 2- Same as Page 2, Panel 2 except now JET is charging forward. Some speed lines in the background.
Panel 3- Tight shot of JET. He’s starting to realize the seriousness of the situation. He starts to stand.
JET: Fine. But I’m only doing this to clear things between us.
JET: I can’t pass up such an easy out.
PAGE 5
Panel 1- JET is walking away from the table. KANESHIRO is putting his sunglasses back on.
KANESHIRO: Godspeed.
Panel 2- Same shot as Page 3, Panel 2. This is the extension of Page 4, Panel 2. Facing the left of the page is the main undead samurai warrior with his sword raised.
Panel 3- KANESHIRO looks thoughtfully out the window. One of his men leans in to talk to him.
TAKAGAWA: Kaneshiro, do you think it’s a good idea sending him?
KANESHIRO: That sword will be safer in his hands than any of yours.
KANESHIRO: He’ll bring it back here as well. If nothing else, he is a man of his word.
PAGE 6
This is where the insanity begins. Now we need some insane action. Instead of all the rectangle shaped panels before, go crazy here. Make as many diagonal edges as possible, to give it the feeling of sword slashes. Don’t forget it’s just about sunset and everything should cast long shadows.
Panel 1- JET stops short as the zombie on his left slices its sword forward. The sword comes straight down the middle of the zombie on his right slicing it in two.
Panel 2- JET snags the sword from the zombie that’s been split in two, ripping it’s rotting hand off as he does. As he does the other zombie raises its sword for another strike.
Panel 3- JET slices right through the zombie’s waist, cutting its torso in half. The top half should be in the process of sliding off.
Panel 4- JET spins around as another zombie lunges its sword forward. JET’S sword lops the zombie’s head off in mid spin. Its head goes flying off.
Panel 5- This panel should be the central shot. The main armored zombie sits, unmoving as the sun sets off in the horizon.
PAGE 7
Similar hectic panel layout as Page 6.
Panel 1- JET launches the sword off to the right side of the page.
Panel 2- A zombie gets pinned against a tree as JET’S sword slams into it.
Panel 3- JET does a jumping spin kick and smacks a zombie’s head right off its shoulders and into another zombie knocking it off balance right before it was about to strike.
Panel 4- JET brings his leg crashing down into the off balance zombie from the panel before, cracking its spine.
Panel 5- Tight shot of JET from the waist up as he turns to face the main zombie.
Panel 6- Close up shot of JET as the tip of a sword rips through his shoulder.
PAGE 8
This can have just a regular panel layout. Nothing too crazy though. Something calm.
Panel 1- JET falls to one knee and grabs his shoulder. The main zombie stands behind him, fresh blood dripping from its sword.
CAPTION: Being honorable really isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.
CAPTION: In fact…it hurts.
CAPTION: A lot.
Panel 2- Tight shot as JET begins to look up. He’s facing away from the samurai zombie and towards the setting sun. Just behind him the zombie is about to deliver its killing blow.
CAPTION: I can’t die like this!
CAPTION: Not for Kaneshiro!
Panel 3- Shot from behind and off to the side of the main zombie so we can see the zombie about to strike, JET struggling through the pain and both of them are facing the sun as it sets in the background.
CAPTION: Sorry Kaneshiro, looks like I won’t be able to get the sword to you before sunset.
Panel 4- Dusk has fallen. Close up of JET as he starts to look over his wounded shoulder.
CAPTION: He’s certainly taking his time with this killing blow here…
PAGE 9
Panel 1- JET struggles to stand. He looks to be in a mixed state of pain/disbelief.
CAPTION: What the hell?
Panel 2- JET’S POV. We see the samurai zombie as he sheathes the sword. He has backed up about ten feet. The headstone begins to glow in the background.
CAPTION: What’s he up to now…?
Panel 3- Tight shot of the headstone with the arcane symbol. It’s glowing ominously.
Panel 4- A demonic (something Japanese) image starts to appear around the samurai zombie.
Panel 5- The samurai zombie begins to fade away as if his image was being pulled away from us at superspeed. All blurry-like.
PAGE 10
Panel 1- JET scoops up a sword with his good hand and dives forward at the image.
CAPTION: Somedays…it’s just not worth being a man of honor.
Panel 2- Slight energy crackles and dissipates, and the samurai zombie and JET are both gone, as is the demonic image. The remaining pieces of zombies fall dead once again.
CAPTION: But I just can’t seem to help it…maybe it’s in the blood.
Panel 3- The same scene as Panel 2 but now all is silent. Nothing is moving, and all energy traces are gone.
Panel 4- Same panel as Panel 3, but now some energy is appearing, crackling in mid-air where JET disappeared.
Panel 5- Same as the above panels but now there is a gaping hole torn through reality. We can just see inside as JET dives out backwards, cut up, blood splattered, with sliced off undead demonic arms hanging off him.
CAPTION: It’s like I said before…
Panel 6- JET is walking away from KANESHIRO’S table in the restaurant. He looks very ragged, and beat up. The sword is stabbed in the middle of the table where JET stuck it.
JET: Next time Kaneshiro...
CAPTION: Somedays…it sucks being a man of honor.
Jet Black #1
Page 1
PANEL 1- Open on a cemetery on a gray and rainy day.
CAPTION: San Francisco, 2000
PANEL 2- Ten or so people dressed in black are gathered around a casket. Most of them hold umbrellas. Central focus is JET BLACK, about 18-19 years old. He has medium length black hair. He is wracked with grief. Someone is holding an umbrella above his head.
PANEL 3- Shot of the casket lowering into the ground. The headstone reads:
‘Chow Li Sung’
Sept. 16, 1952 - October 24, 2001
Page 2
PANEL 1- Same scene as before but now everyone has left, except JET. He is crying silently. He is drenched with rain.
PANEL 2- Close up as a hand rests on his shoulder. Smaller panel.
KAMIKAZE (off panel): I’m sorry for your loss. Your father was a great man and a close friend.
PANEL 3- JET turns and sees a Japanese man of above average size. He is wearing an all white business suit with a red tie. He has a gentleness about him that defies his size. He doesn’t carry an umbrella but he is hardly wet at all.
JET BLACK: Sniff…thanks.
PANEL 4- The man hands JET a business card.
KAMIKAZE: I…worked with your father.
KAMIKAZE: If you ever need anything…anything at all.
PANEL 5- JET looks at the card. It has a stylized L on it, with a phone number.
PANEL 6- His attention drops from the card to the headstone. Close up shot of his face. Over JET’S shoulder KAMIKAZE walks off.
CAPTION: Dad…
Page 3
PANEL 1- Same close up of JET BLACK’S face as the previous page. But now he has short cropped black hair and has sunglasses on, with a black suit. He’s a few years older, and harder. He’s in his mid-twenties, young looking but not a kid. He’s been through some rough times. Think Mark Dacascos/Jet Li as Jack Hawksmoor. He looks like he’s pissed off. Random city shots over his shoulder. (Hot dog vendor/taxis/misc. pedestrians/etc.)
CAPTION: New York City, 2005.
PANEL 2- Pull back and we see him as he enters an office building downtown. He’s wearing a full black business suit. The corporation name ‘MASTERS, INC.’ is labeled on the walls and doors.
PANEL 3- It’s also on the security guards uniforms, who eye him suspiciously as he walks past the front desk. One security guard is talking into a walkie-talkie. Close up on the security guards and in the foreground a shot of JET from his shoulder to mid-waist as he walks by.
PANEL 4- He enters the elevator and presses the elevator button for the top floor. This shot could be from the top corner of the elevator, almost like a security camera.
PANEL 5- Small panel of the elevator doors. It shows a display at the top. Number 85 is lit up.
SFX: DING!
Page 4
PANEL 1- JET steps out. A wide dramatic shot. If this was a movie he’d be stepping out in slow motion. He’s looking down the hall, towards us.
PANEL 2- A bodyguard in a suit (without the jacket and his shirt sleeves rolled up) charges him at superspeed. The guard has long, light colored hair. Maybe some speed lines, or after images to show just how fast he’s moving.
PANEL 3- Without moving the rest of his body JET lets loose a quick kick under the guard’s chin knocking the guard flying backwards. Show this as if it was in slo-mo too. Maybe have the guard spinning through the air with his head arched backwards. JET is standing solidly with his leg fully extended straight up.
Page 5
PANEL 1- Three guards in suits stand in the background. (One is a large, muscular guy, the other two are smaller but have distinct hair styles.) The unconscious superspeed guard is in the foreground at their feet. The three try not to look intimidated.
PANEL 2- Shot of JET from the waist up as he removes his sunglasses. He looks kind of bored.
JET BLACK: You know who I am, and you know what I’ll do to you.
PANELS 3 4 5- These panels combined could be half the page length-wise and full page width-wise, broken up into three separate panels. In each panel is one guard in mid-change to elemental form.
Guard One arches his arms back and ignites into flames, Guard Two raises his arms as his body turns to water, and Guard Three’s body grows larger as his skin converts into a million small rocks.
Page 6
PANEL 1- A full shot of JET as he tucks his sunglasses into his pocket. He is standing very casually.
JET BLACK: I see you’ve made your decision.
PANEL 2- The second full page panel is from just behind JET. The three guards now in full elemental form ready themselves for the attack.
PANEL 3- JET BLACK shoots forward and slides in towards the Guards. (Maybe some speed lines for a background to show how fast he’s moving.)
Page 7
Panel 1- With his left arm JET grabs the FIRE-GUARD’S right arm.
PANEL 2- JET is still holding the FIRE-GUARD’S arm while he’s on fire. JET looks very calm as he twists the FIRE-GUARD’S arm and breaks it. The FIRE-GUARD throws his head back in pain.
SFX: KRACK!
FIRE-GUARD: AAAHHH F…
PANEL 3- Then JET pokes him in the throat with two fingers using his free hand, blocking off his air. (JET’S still holding his other arm.) The FIRE-GUARD gasps.
FIRE-GUARD: ACK!
PANEL 4- He then kicks (or flips) him into the WATER-GUARD, resulting in a lot of steam, and screams.
FIRE&WATER-GUARD: ARRRRGGGGGHHHH!
Page 8
PANEL 1- JET then spins around them and punches the rock guy with all his might dead center.
SFX: WHAMM!
PANEL 2- Close up of the ROCK-GUARD as he just looks down and laughs.
ROCK-GUARD- HAW HAW HAW-
PANEL 3- Same panel as above but he looks surprised.
ROCK-GUARD- HUH?
PANEL 4- Shot from behind the rock guy as he falls apart into smaller rocks. JET can be seen between the falling rocks. JET remains held in the same punching position as Page 4, Panel 5.
PANEL 5- JET stands before a double door. The plaque reads: MASTERS, CEO.
JET BLACK: Masters…
Page 9
PANEL 1- From inside the massive office, we see JET BLACK kicking open the doors. The unconscious Fire/Water/Rock guards, or their remnants anyway, can be seen in the hallway. Inside the office is a man in a suit with silver-gray hair. He is wearing an expensive suit and stands before a large, ornate desk.
MASTERS: Mr. Black do come in. Would you care for some coffee?
PANEL 2- JET walks up and punches him full force. MASTERS stumbles back into his desk.
PANEL 3- MASTERS stands, and regains his composure, straightening his tie.
MASTERS: Bravo Mr. Black. I actually felt that. It’s been awhile since I felt any pain.
MASTERS: Almost…enjoyable.
PANEL 4- JET jabs two fingers into MASTERS’ neck and MASTERS looks very shocked. He begins to gasp.
PANEL 5- MASTERS falls to his knees clutching his throat as JET walks around casually, looking at the pictures on MASTERS’ wall.
JET BLACK: Now, without the interruptions, Mr. Masters…I know all about your personal bio-field and how it protects you from getting hurt.
JET BLACK: As you probably figured out by now…it’s useless against me.
JET BLACK: I can still hit your pressure points and I’ve just closed off your windpipe.
JET BLACK: It’s temporary but it’ll keep you quiet until I’m finished.
Page 10
PANEL 1- JET is walking behind MASTERS’ desk. He pulls his chair over. MASTERS is on the floor gasping. JET is looking off out the window. He is very calm and composed.
JET BLACK: Now, I know you’ve had a visit from a chronal-manipulator. The building reeks of its energy signature.
JET BLACK: What I want to know, and this is a yes or no, do or die type question here…
PANEL 2- JET leans in real close over the desk, fury in his eyes.
JET BLACK: Was it Father Time?
PANEL 3- MASTERS fumbles a crystal from his pocket. It lands on the desk.
JET BLACK: All I’m looking for is a nod here.
PANEL 4- JET BLACK slams his fist down into the desk, smashing the crystal to pieces.
JET BLACK: WAS IT HIM?!?
PANEL 5- MASTERS nods.
Page 11
PANEL 1- JET stands and regains his composure, readjusting his suit. He stands and walks out from behind the desk.
JETBLACK: Finally…
PANEL 2- JET turns to leave. MASTERS begins to gasp his last few breaths. Then JET turns back towards MASTERS.
JET BLACK: Oh yeah, I forgot…since you were so helpful…
PANEL 3- JET pokes MASTERS in the neck again, but in a different spot.
PANEL 4- MASTERS breathes in a huge deep breath.
JET BLACK (off panel): There ya go…you take care now.
PANEL 5- JET then side kicks him right out the window.
Page 12
PANEL 1- Shot of MASTERS as he plummets to the street below.
MASTERS- AAAAAAHHHHH!
PANEL 2- The CHRONONAUT hears screaming and looks up. The CHRONONAUT is a kid about 18, with an innocent look about him. He’s wearing just a futuristic-looking jacket with a clock design on the back, a white T-shirt, and jeans. He’s buying a hot dog from a hot dog vendor. The vendor and all the casual pedestrians look up.
CHRONONAUT: Not again…
PANEL 3- He runs to try and clear the people from the area.
CHRONONAUT: Lookout! Lookout! Get back!
PANEL 4- CHRONONAUT turns his head, flinching and making an “ooooh” face as MASTERS slams against the sidewalk, making a crater and kicking up dust from the pulverized concrete. People run screaming, some stand paralyzed.
SFX: BOOOM!
PANEL 5- The dust is settling and people are rubber-necking, and taking pictures.
Page 13
PANEL 1- JET BLACK comes walking out of the building. He walks over to CHRONONAUT. He’s putting on his sunglasses.
JET BLACK: He was here…
PANEL 2- JET BLACK and CHRONONAUT walk away from the scene. In the background people gasp as a shaky hand pops out of the crater.
CHRONONAUT: Really?
CHRONONAUT: What now?
PANEL 3- They are further away from the crater still, and closer to us. MASTERS stands up from the crater dazed.
JET BLACK: Now, we head back to HQ and find out where he went.
PANEL 4- MASTERS collapses into the crater. We see JET BLACK and CHRONONAUT’S shoulders as they turn to energy and fade out.
JET BLACK: Then we take him out of the game.
Page 14
PANEL 1- JET is inside the LEAGUE HQ (JLA Watchtower meets the Authority’s Carrier and then some). It is expansive and technical beyond belief. Shining, and sleek. A few people in uniforms (think more like jumpsuits than costumes) are running equipment.
CAPTION: League HQ, Between Reality and Unreality.
PANEL 2- A slightly older KAMIKAZE from the flashback flies down, and begins hovering alongside JET. KAMIKAZE is wearing an all white suit/uniform with a red circle design in the center.
KAMIKAZE: Jet, we have to talk. I’m concerned about you.
PANEL 3- JET is walking along not really looking like he’s paying attention to KAMIKAZE.
KAMIKAZE: I had you head up the search for Father Time as a favor to you…and your father.
KAMIKAZE: But you just threw a man out of his office window.
PANEL 4- JET is looking annoyed by the conversation.
JET BLACK: It was just Masters…I bet he doesn’t have anything worse than a headache.
KAMIKAZE: Regardless…that doesn’t mean you can do what you like to him. The man does have certain rights we must respect…
PANEL 5- JET still looking disinterested, as KAMIKAZE looks off in the distance, almost unsure of his words.
JET BLACK: Suddenly we work within the law?
KAMIKAZE: We’ve had this conversation before…you know I can’t condone this behavior. If your methods don’t change, I’ll…
Page 15
PANEL 1- JET turns and faces KAMIKAZE. There’s a fury in his eyes.
JET BLACK: You’ll what?! C’mon…what?
JET BLACK: This world doesn’t live by your moral code!
JET BLACK: If I don’t catch this psycho before he slips back into the Timestream… who knows when he’ll appear again!
PANEL 2- Shot of JET clenching his fists.
JET BLACK: You know what happened last time he popped up.
JET BLACK: I have to grab him before…
PANEL 3- JET looks suddenly calm and sympathetic. Dramatic shot.
JET BLACK: I owe it to my father…
PANEL 4- KAMIKAZE looks saddened by the sudden thought of JET’S father.
KAMIKAZE: I know…that’s why I brought you in.
KAMIKAZE: But I also assigned Chrononaut to you in hopes you’d use a little more restraint.
KAMIKAZE: Against my better judgement, and only because I owed your father my life…I won’t report this to the others in the Directorate.
KAMIKAZE: Just be careful…please.
PANEL 5- JET walks off towards us (the foreground), leaving KAMIKAZE floating behind in the background. JET has a look of grim determination.
JET BLACK: I will…and don’t worry…
JET BLACK: This will all be over very soon.
PANEL 1- Open on a cemetery on a gray and rainy day.
CAPTION: San Francisco, 2000
PANEL 2- Ten or so people dressed in black are gathered around a casket. Most of them hold umbrellas. Central focus is JET BLACK, about 18-19 years old. He has medium length black hair. He is wracked with grief. Someone is holding an umbrella above his head.
PANEL 3- Shot of the casket lowering into the ground. The headstone reads:
‘Chow Li Sung’
Sept. 16, 1952 - October 24, 2001
Page 2
PANEL 1- Same scene as before but now everyone has left, except JET. He is crying silently. He is drenched with rain.
PANEL 2- Close up as a hand rests on his shoulder. Smaller panel.
KAMIKAZE (off panel): I’m sorry for your loss. Your father was a great man and a close friend.
PANEL 3- JET turns and sees a Japanese man of above average size. He is wearing an all white business suit with a red tie. He has a gentleness about him that defies his size. He doesn’t carry an umbrella but he is hardly wet at all.
JET BLACK: Sniff…thanks.
PANEL 4- The man hands JET a business card.
KAMIKAZE: I…worked with your father.
KAMIKAZE: If you ever need anything…anything at all.
PANEL 5- JET looks at the card. It has a stylized L on it, with a phone number.
PANEL 6- His attention drops from the card to the headstone. Close up shot of his face. Over JET’S shoulder KAMIKAZE walks off.
CAPTION: Dad…
Page 3
PANEL 1- Same close up of JET BLACK’S face as the previous page. But now he has short cropped black hair and has sunglasses on, with a black suit. He’s a few years older, and harder. He’s in his mid-twenties, young looking but not a kid. He’s been through some rough times. Think Mark Dacascos/Jet Li as Jack Hawksmoor. He looks like he’s pissed off. Random city shots over his shoulder. (Hot dog vendor/taxis/misc. pedestrians/etc.)
CAPTION: New York City, 2005.
PANEL 2- Pull back and we see him as he enters an office building downtown. He’s wearing a full black business suit. The corporation name ‘MASTERS, INC.’ is labeled on the walls and doors.
PANEL 3- It’s also on the security guards uniforms, who eye him suspiciously as he walks past the front desk. One security guard is talking into a walkie-talkie. Close up on the security guards and in the foreground a shot of JET from his shoulder to mid-waist as he walks by.
PANEL 4- He enters the elevator and presses the elevator button for the top floor. This shot could be from the top corner of the elevator, almost like a security camera.
PANEL 5- Small panel of the elevator doors. It shows a display at the top. Number 85 is lit up.
SFX: DING!
Page 4
PANEL 1- JET steps out. A wide dramatic shot. If this was a movie he’d be stepping out in slow motion. He’s looking down the hall, towards us.
PANEL 2- A bodyguard in a suit (without the jacket and his shirt sleeves rolled up) charges him at superspeed. The guard has long, light colored hair. Maybe some speed lines, or after images to show just how fast he’s moving.
PANEL 3- Without moving the rest of his body JET lets loose a quick kick under the guard’s chin knocking the guard flying backwards. Show this as if it was in slo-mo too. Maybe have the guard spinning through the air with his head arched backwards. JET is standing solidly with his leg fully extended straight up.
Page 5
PANEL 1- Three guards in suits stand in the background. (One is a large, muscular guy, the other two are smaller but have distinct hair styles.) The unconscious superspeed guard is in the foreground at their feet. The three try not to look intimidated.
PANEL 2- Shot of JET from the waist up as he removes his sunglasses. He looks kind of bored.
JET BLACK: You know who I am, and you know what I’ll do to you.
PANELS 3 4 5- These panels combined could be half the page length-wise and full page width-wise, broken up into three separate panels. In each panel is one guard in mid-change to elemental form.
Guard One arches his arms back and ignites into flames, Guard Two raises his arms as his body turns to water, and Guard Three’s body grows larger as his skin converts into a million small rocks.
Page 6
PANEL 1- A full shot of JET as he tucks his sunglasses into his pocket. He is standing very casually.
JET BLACK: I see you’ve made your decision.
PANEL 2- The second full page panel is from just behind JET. The three guards now in full elemental form ready themselves for the attack.
PANEL 3- JET BLACK shoots forward and slides in towards the Guards. (Maybe some speed lines for a background to show how fast he’s moving.)
Page 7
Panel 1- With his left arm JET grabs the FIRE-GUARD’S right arm.
PANEL 2- JET is still holding the FIRE-GUARD’S arm while he’s on fire. JET looks very calm as he twists the FIRE-GUARD’S arm and breaks it. The FIRE-GUARD throws his head back in pain.
SFX: KRACK!
FIRE-GUARD: AAAHHH F…
PANEL 3- Then JET pokes him in the throat with two fingers using his free hand, blocking off his air. (JET’S still holding his other arm.) The FIRE-GUARD gasps.
FIRE-GUARD: ACK!
PANEL 4- He then kicks (or flips) him into the WATER-GUARD, resulting in a lot of steam, and screams.
FIRE&WATER-GUARD: ARRRRGGGGGHHHH!
Page 8
PANEL 1- JET then spins around them and punches the rock guy with all his might dead center.
SFX: WHAMM!
PANEL 2- Close up of the ROCK-GUARD as he just looks down and laughs.
ROCK-GUARD- HAW HAW HAW-
PANEL 3- Same panel as above but he looks surprised.
ROCK-GUARD- HUH?
PANEL 4- Shot from behind the rock guy as he falls apart into smaller rocks. JET can be seen between the falling rocks. JET remains held in the same punching position as Page 4, Panel 5.
PANEL 5- JET stands before a double door. The plaque reads: MASTERS, CEO.
JET BLACK: Masters…
Page 9
PANEL 1- From inside the massive office, we see JET BLACK kicking open the doors. The unconscious Fire/Water/Rock guards, or their remnants anyway, can be seen in the hallway. Inside the office is a man in a suit with silver-gray hair. He is wearing an expensive suit and stands before a large, ornate desk.
MASTERS: Mr. Black do come in. Would you care for some coffee?
PANEL 2- JET walks up and punches him full force. MASTERS stumbles back into his desk.
PANEL 3- MASTERS stands, and regains his composure, straightening his tie.
MASTERS: Bravo Mr. Black. I actually felt that. It’s been awhile since I felt any pain.
MASTERS: Almost…enjoyable.
PANEL 4- JET jabs two fingers into MASTERS’ neck and MASTERS looks very shocked. He begins to gasp.
PANEL 5- MASTERS falls to his knees clutching his throat as JET walks around casually, looking at the pictures on MASTERS’ wall.
JET BLACK: Now, without the interruptions, Mr. Masters…I know all about your personal bio-field and how it protects you from getting hurt.
JET BLACK: As you probably figured out by now…it’s useless against me.
JET BLACK: I can still hit your pressure points and I’ve just closed off your windpipe.
JET BLACK: It’s temporary but it’ll keep you quiet until I’m finished.
Page 10
PANEL 1- JET is walking behind MASTERS’ desk. He pulls his chair over. MASTERS is on the floor gasping. JET is looking off out the window. He is very calm and composed.
JET BLACK: Now, I know you’ve had a visit from a chronal-manipulator. The building reeks of its energy signature.
JET BLACK: What I want to know, and this is a yes or no, do or die type question here…
PANEL 2- JET leans in real close over the desk, fury in his eyes.
JET BLACK: Was it Father Time?
PANEL 3- MASTERS fumbles a crystal from his pocket. It lands on the desk.
JET BLACK: All I’m looking for is a nod here.
PANEL 4- JET BLACK slams his fist down into the desk, smashing the crystal to pieces.
JET BLACK: WAS IT HIM?!?
PANEL 5- MASTERS nods.
Page 11
PANEL 1- JET stands and regains his composure, readjusting his suit. He stands and walks out from behind the desk.
JETBLACK: Finally…
PANEL 2- JET turns to leave. MASTERS begins to gasp his last few breaths. Then JET turns back towards MASTERS.
JET BLACK: Oh yeah, I forgot…since you were so helpful…
PANEL 3- JET pokes MASTERS in the neck again, but in a different spot.
PANEL 4- MASTERS breathes in a huge deep breath.
JET BLACK (off panel): There ya go…you take care now.
PANEL 5- JET then side kicks him right out the window.
Page 12
PANEL 1- Shot of MASTERS as he plummets to the street below.
MASTERS- AAAAAAHHHHH!
PANEL 2- The CHRONONAUT hears screaming and looks up. The CHRONONAUT is a kid about 18, with an innocent look about him. He’s wearing just a futuristic-looking jacket with a clock design on the back, a white T-shirt, and jeans. He’s buying a hot dog from a hot dog vendor. The vendor and all the casual pedestrians look up.
CHRONONAUT: Not again…
PANEL 3- He runs to try and clear the people from the area.
CHRONONAUT: Lookout! Lookout! Get back!
PANEL 4- CHRONONAUT turns his head, flinching and making an “ooooh” face as MASTERS slams against the sidewalk, making a crater and kicking up dust from the pulverized concrete. People run screaming, some stand paralyzed.
SFX: BOOOM!
PANEL 5- The dust is settling and people are rubber-necking, and taking pictures.
Page 13
PANEL 1- JET BLACK comes walking out of the building. He walks over to CHRONONAUT. He’s putting on his sunglasses.
JET BLACK: He was here…
PANEL 2- JET BLACK and CHRONONAUT walk away from the scene. In the background people gasp as a shaky hand pops out of the crater.
CHRONONAUT: Really?
CHRONONAUT: What now?
PANEL 3- They are further away from the crater still, and closer to us. MASTERS stands up from the crater dazed.
JET BLACK: Now, we head back to HQ and find out where he went.
PANEL 4- MASTERS collapses into the crater. We see JET BLACK and CHRONONAUT’S shoulders as they turn to energy and fade out.
JET BLACK: Then we take him out of the game.
Page 14
PANEL 1- JET is inside the LEAGUE HQ (JLA Watchtower meets the Authority’s Carrier and then some). It is expansive and technical beyond belief. Shining, and sleek. A few people in uniforms (think more like jumpsuits than costumes) are running equipment.
CAPTION: League HQ, Between Reality and Unreality.
PANEL 2- A slightly older KAMIKAZE from the flashback flies down, and begins hovering alongside JET. KAMIKAZE is wearing an all white suit/uniform with a red circle design in the center.
KAMIKAZE: Jet, we have to talk. I’m concerned about you.
PANEL 3- JET is walking along not really looking like he’s paying attention to KAMIKAZE.
KAMIKAZE: I had you head up the search for Father Time as a favor to you…and your father.
KAMIKAZE: But you just threw a man out of his office window.
PANEL 4- JET is looking annoyed by the conversation.
JET BLACK: It was just Masters…I bet he doesn’t have anything worse than a headache.
KAMIKAZE: Regardless…that doesn’t mean you can do what you like to him. The man does have certain rights we must respect…
PANEL 5- JET still looking disinterested, as KAMIKAZE looks off in the distance, almost unsure of his words.
JET BLACK: Suddenly we work within the law?
KAMIKAZE: We’ve had this conversation before…you know I can’t condone this behavior. If your methods don’t change, I’ll…
Page 15
PANEL 1- JET turns and faces KAMIKAZE. There’s a fury in his eyes.
JET BLACK: You’ll what?! C’mon…what?
JET BLACK: This world doesn’t live by your moral code!
JET BLACK: If I don’t catch this psycho before he slips back into the Timestream… who knows when he’ll appear again!
PANEL 2- Shot of JET clenching his fists.
JET BLACK: You know what happened last time he popped up.
JET BLACK: I have to grab him before…
PANEL 3- JET looks suddenly calm and sympathetic. Dramatic shot.
JET BLACK: I owe it to my father…
PANEL 4- KAMIKAZE looks saddened by the sudden thought of JET’S father.
KAMIKAZE: I know…that’s why I brought you in.
KAMIKAZE: But I also assigned Chrononaut to you in hopes you’d use a little more restraint.
KAMIKAZE: Against my better judgement, and only because I owed your father my life…I won’t report this to the others in the Directorate.
KAMIKAZE: Just be careful…please.
PANEL 5- JET walks off towards us (the foreground), leaving KAMIKAZE floating behind in the background. JET has a look of grim determination.
JET BLACK: I will…and don’t worry…
JET BLACK: This will all be over very soon.
Thursday, February 19, 2009
Writing Project Updates
I've just posted a bunch of old work recovered from old Myspace blog posts. After losing so many writing sites I hope that this will now be the definitive place to store and read all my work.
Here are the Comicbook Rockstar posts which I will be continuing as my career in comics develops.
Comicbook Rockstar
Here are the short stories that make up the superhero dating series TwentySix.
TwentySix
And here are just some random short stories that I really like:
Short Stories
I'll be focusing on some other older works I enjoy soon as I work on new scripts.
See what a mix of the old and new can produce.
K
Here are the Comicbook Rockstar posts which I will be continuing as my career in comics develops.
Comicbook Rockstar
Here are the short stories that make up the superhero dating series TwentySix.
TwentySix
And here are just some random short stories that I really like:
Short Stories
I'll be focusing on some other older works I enjoy soon as I work on new scripts.
See what a mix of the old and new can produce.
K
Star Wars: Jedi Battle Old School Script
Page 1
PANEL 1- Wide shot to show the entire city of a high tech futuristic world and atop a huge silver skyscraper (Even the flying cars don’t go this high) stand two men.
PANEL 2- Zoom in. One dressed in a dark cloak (Mal-Zey Kahnn) the other (Meh-Ran Kahnn) in his Jedi robes.
PANEL 3- Zoom in close behind Meh-Ran Kahnn. Shot from his waist with his lightsaber in the foreground and Mal-Zey Kahnn in the background. Both men hold unignited lightsabers in their hands.
PANEL 4- Similar shot from Meh-Ran Kahnn’s waist.
Page 2
PANEL 1- Shot of Meh-Ran Kahnn. A look of grim determination on his face.
MEH-RAN: Mal-Zey Kahnn! For atrocities committed against your kin and clan…
PANEL 2- Opposite of panel 1 shot of Mal-Zey Kahnn. Mal-Zey grins menacingly from beneath his hood. His smile is the only thing visible, and barely.
MAL-ZEY: What clan? They’re all dead…
PANEL 3- Back to Panel 1 shot of Meh-Ran.
MEH-RAN: And by the authority of the Jedi Council…
PANEL 4- Same as Panel 2.
MAL-ZEY: Don’t make me laugh. I know full well that they no longer support your vengeance-fueled quest to bring me in. Something about your methods…
PANEL 5- Same as panel 1 but now Meh-Ran is getting enraged.
MEH-RAN: I ORDER you to lay down your lightsaber and surrender yourself!
PANEL 6- Same as panel 2 but now with one hand Mal-Zey is pulling back the hood of his cloak.
MAL-ZEY: That’s not what you really want…you want to pry it from my cold, dead fingers…tell me, am I right…
Page 3
PANEL 1- Big panel shot of Mal-Zey with his hood thrown back. He looks almost identical to Meh-Ran with tribal tattoos around his eyes.
MAL-ZEY: Brother?
PANEL 2- Meh-Ran still enraged even further.
MEH-RAN: YOU ARE NO LONGER MY BROTHER! PREPARE YOUR SOULSELF! FOR NOW, YOU DIE!
PANEL 3- Wide shot similar to page 1 panel 3, pulled back just a bit to see Meh-Ran’s lightsaber ignite.
PANEL 4- Wide shot similar to page 1 panel 4, pulled back to see Mal-Zey’s lightsaber ignite as well.
Page 4
PANEL 1- Meh-Ran charges swinging his lightsaber.
PANEL 2- Mal-Zey raises his lightsaber before him, but otherwise stands unmoving.
PANEL 3- Meh-Ran slams his lightsaber down and Mal-Zey blocks it. This should be a huge panel. Emphasis on the sparks between their lightsabers.
Page 5
Short but fluid shots to give that quick kung fu quality of a lightsaber duel.
PANEL 1- Mal-Zey pushes Meh-Ran back a few steps.
PANEL 2- Mal-Zey whips his lightsaber around and goes for a side shot.
PANEL 3- Meh-Ran swings his lightsaber down and blocks it.
PANEL 4- Meh-Ran whips his lightsaber up and swings for Mal-Zey’s neck. Mal-Zey’s lightsaber shoots up and blocks.
PANEL 5- Meh-Ran swings his lightsaber around tries the same attack from the other side.
PANEL 6- Mal-Zey blocks, knocking Meh-Ran’s lightsaber wide.
Page 6
More short, quick, and fluid shots.
PANEL 1- Mal-Zey thrusting his lightsaber, Meh-Ran flipping to the side.
PANEL 2- Mal-Zey slams his lightsaber down and Meh-Ran backflips, barely avoiding it.
PANEL 3- Meh-Ran leaps with an upward thrust meant for Mal-Zey’s head.
PANEL 4- Mal-Zey ducks and spins around and swings his lightsaber in an upward stroke just missing Meh-Ran and slicing some antennae and various arrays in half.
PANEL 5- Meh-Ran brings his lightsaber around and swings low. Mal-Zey leaps in the air.
PANEL 6- Mal-Zey lands atop a large rectangular device (like the massive air conditioners on top of buildings in NYC).
Page 7
PANEL 1- Meh-Ran stabs his lightsaber into the massive machine.
PANEL 2- Meh-Ran leaps into the air ripping the machine in two. Mal-Zey forward flips over Meh-Ran’s lightsaber’s arc.
PANEL 3- Mal-Zey lands in a defensive crouch with his back slightly turned towards Meh-Ran.
MAL-ZEY: Not bad, brother! If you fought like this back then maybe that wife and runt of yours would still be alive.
PANEL 4- Meh-Ran has lost it. A berserker fury has taken over. He runs at Mal-Zey.
PANEL 5- The lightsabers slam together sparking.
PANEL 6- Mal-Zey leans in close as they are pushing against each other’s lightsaber.
MAL-ZEY: That’s it brother, use that rage! Only by embracing the Dark Side will you destroy me!
Page 8
More fast and furious panels.
PANEL 1,2,3,4,5,6- Meh-Ran swings his lightsaber around. Meh-Ran lets loose with a barrage of strong blows. Mal-Zey blocks most with no problem, but the last few get a little closer than he’d like. Mal-Zey is backing up, the edge of the building is getting closer. The winds are getting fiercer as well.
Page 9
PANEL 1- Mal-Zey is blocking and looking a little nervous. He’s very close to the edge.
MEH-RAN: What’s the matter, brother?
PANEL 2- Mal-Zey is right on the edge now.
MEH-RAN: May your soulself burn in the Eternal Fires of Saizu!
PANEL 3- Meh-Ran swings his lightsaber down about to cut Mal-Zey down, or at least knock him from the building.
PANEL 4- Mal-Zey dives and rolls to Meh-Ran’s left.
PANEL 5- Meh-Ran is in mid arc as Mal-Zey brings his lightsaber around. He is aiming for Meh-Ran’s forearm.
Page 10
PANEL 1- Huge panel of Meh-Ran’s lightsaber arm being sliced in two by the elbow. Meh-Ran is holding back the pain.
PANEL 2- Shot close up of Meh-Ran’s arm holding the lightsaber as it plummets over the side of the building. It should be miles upon miles to the ground. We shouldn’t even see the ground.
PANEL 3- Close up of Meh-Ran’s face. Pain, rage, and fear.
PANEL 4- Shot of Mal-Zey with his lightsaber still ignited, chuckling to himself.
PANEL 5- Shot of the arm and lightsaber a little further than before.
PANEL 6- Full shot of Meh-Ran turning to his right to face Mal-Zey. He is extending his left arm.
Page 11
PANEL 1- Shot of the lightsaber being ripped free from Meh-Ran’s lost arm and flying through the air.
PANEL 2- Shot of Mal-Zey chuckling again, with his lightsaber raised about to strike.
PANEL 3- Close shot of Meh-Ran’s lightsaber flying up into his left hand.
PANEL 4- Huge panel of Meh-Ran slicing a gash across Mal-Zey’s chest. Mal-Zey is very surprised, to say the least.
Page 12
PANEL 1- Mal-Zey looks up and he is pissed off. But he is also smirking.
MAL-ZEY: My, my, brother…I didn’t know you had it in you to be so…brutal. I like it.
PANEL 2- Meh-Ran readies for another strike to end this.
PANEL 3- Mal-Zey throws his hand forward.
PANEL 4- Meh-Ran is slammed backwards off the side of the building.
PANEL 5- Downwards shot of Meh-Ran falling backwards.
PANEL 6- Mal-Zey readies himself and leaps off the side off the building.
MAL-ZEY: WAIT FOR ME BROTHER!
Page 13
PANEL 1- Mal-Zey drops through the air feet first, streamlining his body, to catch up to Meh-Ran. Lightsaber still ignited.
PANEL 2- Side shot of Meh-Ran flailing through the air and Mal-Zey catching up as they plummet down the building past domed catwalks filled with surprised onlookers.
PANEL 3- Mal-Zey turns his body to catch the wind to slow himself, and attacks with his lightsaber.
PANEL 4- Meh-Ran blocks the blow with his lightsaber.
PANEL 5- The two men spin through the air while swinging their lightsabers wildly, blocking each other’s shots.
PANEL 6- Meh-Ran whips himself backward through the air.
Page 14
PANEL 1- Meh-Ran and Mal-Zey just miss a domed catwalk, each of them passing on either side.
PANEL 2- Mal-Zey leans forward, shooting towards Meh-Ran, lightsaber stretched forward.
PANEL 3- Meh-Ran curls up and spins over Mal-Zey’s head.
PANEL 4- Meh-Ran uncurls, and lashes out with his lightsaber, Mal-Zey blocks.
PANEL 5- Meh-Ran shoots his hand out, while still gripping his lightsaber.
PANEL 6- Mal-Zey slams against the building, letting out a loud “Ooomph!”
Page 15
PANEL 1- Meh-Ran then points and shoots his hand upwards.
PANEL 2- Mal-Zey is still woozy from the hit against the building. His lightsaber gets yanked free from his hand and flies upward.
PANEL 3- Meh-Ran moves in close and grabs Mal-Zey. Meh-Ran holds his lightsaber just inches from Mal-Zey.
MEH-RAN: I will have my revenge before I die!
PANEL 4- Meh-Ran about to strike, suddenly looks very surprised, as does Mal-Zey.
Page 16
PANEL 1- Side shot of the two slamming into a passing flying car.
PANEL 2- The car is big enough so they didn’t damage it too bad, they just smashed into the roof. It stops flying and hovers.
PANEL 3- The two men are very woozy but are getting to their feet. An alien pops out of the roof hatch.
PANEL 4- Shot of the alien. He looks pissed off.
PANEL 5- Shot of the two men from the alien’s POV. They are broken, battered, and beaten and look very, very pissed off too.
PANEL 6- The alien mocking a whistle goes back into the hatch, sealing it behind him.
Page 17
PANEL 1- Meh-Ran turns back to Mal-Zey. He reignites his lightsaber and begins walking towards Mal-Zey. Mal-Zey is looking up, discretely.
MEH-RAN: Now, I finish this.
PANEL 2- Mal-Zey holds his hand out.
PANEL 3- Shot of Mal-Zey’s lightsaber falling through the air.
PANEL 4- Huge panel of Mal-Zey, who, in one fluid motion caught his lightsaber and blocks Meh-Ran’s strike.
Page 18
PANEL 1,2,3,4,5,- Various shots of the lightsaber duel continuing atop the hovering car. Fast, furious, and just nasty fighting.
PANEL 6- Mal-Zey tackles Meh-Ran and they drop off the car.
Page 19
PANEL 1- Meh-Ran is struggling with Mal-Zey as they fall.
PANEL 2- They continue to struggle as a catwalk is approaching fast.
PANEL 3- Big panel of them smashing through the roof and hitting the catwalk. No one is on this catwalk. Meh-Ran takes the brunt of the fall.
PANEL 4- The two men lay there unable to move for the moment.
Page 20
PANEL 1- Mal-Zey is scrambling as he lays flat against the ground for Meh-Ran’s lightsaber, which is just out of his reach. Meh-Ran sees what he is reaching for and pulls him back by his leg.
PANEL 2- Mal-Zey is crawling towards it and Meh-Ran is dragging himself along using Mal-Zey’s robes.
PANEL 3- Closer and closer. Mal-Zey’s fingers are an inch away. Meh-Ran is almost lying next to Mal-Zey.
PANEL 4- Mal-Zey grips the lightsaber. Meh-Ran grabs Mal-Zey around the neck.
PANEL 5- Shot of the lightsaber igniting.
PANEL 6- Shot of a manic Meh-Ran as he SNAPS Mal-Zey’s neck.
Page 21
PANEL 1- Big panel of Meh-Ran pushing himself to his feet. The Mal-Zey corpse lies at his feet.
PANEL 2- Shot of Meh-Ran looking solemn and remorseful.
MEH-RAN: What have I done brother? What have I become? I am the true tragedy of our clan. I have let our legacy die in disgrace and hatred.
PANEL 3- Meh-Ran picks up his lightsaber.
MEH-RAN: Forgive me my clan, forgive me Meh-Li, Meh-Bya…
PANEL 4- Meh-Ran looks distantly at Mal-Zey’s body.
MEH-RAN: Forgive me brother…I’m sorry I wasn’t able to save you this time.
PANEL 5- Meh-Ran drops to his knees, lightsaber in hand.
Meh-Ran: May Tensou have mercy on my soulself.
Page 22
PANEL 1- Half page close shot of Meh-Ran driving his lightsaber into his stomach.
PANEL 2- The rest of the page is a far shot of the catwalk, centered on Meh-Ran lying dead on his side, next to Mal-Zey. Lightsaber unignited.
PANEL 1- Wide shot to show the entire city of a high tech futuristic world and atop a huge silver skyscraper (Even the flying cars don’t go this high) stand two men.
PANEL 2- Zoom in. One dressed in a dark cloak (Mal-Zey Kahnn) the other (Meh-Ran Kahnn) in his Jedi robes.
PANEL 3- Zoom in close behind Meh-Ran Kahnn. Shot from his waist with his lightsaber in the foreground and Mal-Zey Kahnn in the background. Both men hold unignited lightsabers in their hands.
PANEL 4- Similar shot from Meh-Ran Kahnn’s waist.
Page 2
PANEL 1- Shot of Meh-Ran Kahnn. A look of grim determination on his face.
MEH-RAN: Mal-Zey Kahnn! For atrocities committed against your kin and clan…
PANEL 2- Opposite of panel 1 shot of Mal-Zey Kahnn. Mal-Zey grins menacingly from beneath his hood. His smile is the only thing visible, and barely.
MAL-ZEY: What clan? They’re all dead…
PANEL 3- Back to Panel 1 shot of Meh-Ran.
MEH-RAN: And by the authority of the Jedi Council…
PANEL 4- Same as Panel 2.
MAL-ZEY: Don’t make me laugh. I know full well that they no longer support your vengeance-fueled quest to bring me in. Something about your methods…
PANEL 5- Same as panel 1 but now Meh-Ran is getting enraged.
MEH-RAN: I ORDER you to lay down your lightsaber and surrender yourself!
PANEL 6- Same as panel 2 but now with one hand Mal-Zey is pulling back the hood of his cloak.
MAL-ZEY: That’s not what you really want…you want to pry it from my cold, dead fingers…tell me, am I right…
Page 3
PANEL 1- Big panel shot of Mal-Zey with his hood thrown back. He looks almost identical to Meh-Ran with tribal tattoos around his eyes.
MAL-ZEY: Brother?
PANEL 2- Meh-Ran still enraged even further.
MEH-RAN: YOU ARE NO LONGER MY BROTHER! PREPARE YOUR SOULSELF! FOR NOW, YOU DIE!
PANEL 3- Wide shot similar to page 1 panel 3, pulled back just a bit to see Meh-Ran’s lightsaber ignite.
PANEL 4- Wide shot similar to page 1 panel 4, pulled back to see Mal-Zey’s lightsaber ignite as well.
Page 4
PANEL 1- Meh-Ran charges swinging his lightsaber.
PANEL 2- Mal-Zey raises his lightsaber before him, but otherwise stands unmoving.
PANEL 3- Meh-Ran slams his lightsaber down and Mal-Zey blocks it. This should be a huge panel. Emphasis on the sparks between their lightsabers.
Page 5
Short but fluid shots to give that quick kung fu quality of a lightsaber duel.
PANEL 1- Mal-Zey pushes Meh-Ran back a few steps.
PANEL 2- Mal-Zey whips his lightsaber around and goes for a side shot.
PANEL 3- Meh-Ran swings his lightsaber down and blocks it.
PANEL 4- Meh-Ran whips his lightsaber up and swings for Mal-Zey’s neck. Mal-Zey’s lightsaber shoots up and blocks.
PANEL 5- Meh-Ran swings his lightsaber around tries the same attack from the other side.
PANEL 6- Mal-Zey blocks, knocking Meh-Ran’s lightsaber wide.
Page 6
More short, quick, and fluid shots.
PANEL 1- Mal-Zey thrusting his lightsaber, Meh-Ran flipping to the side.
PANEL 2- Mal-Zey slams his lightsaber down and Meh-Ran backflips, barely avoiding it.
PANEL 3- Meh-Ran leaps with an upward thrust meant for Mal-Zey’s head.
PANEL 4- Mal-Zey ducks and spins around and swings his lightsaber in an upward stroke just missing Meh-Ran and slicing some antennae and various arrays in half.
PANEL 5- Meh-Ran brings his lightsaber around and swings low. Mal-Zey leaps in the air.
PANEL 6- Mal-Zey lands atop a large rectangular device (like the massive air conditioners on top of buildings in NYC).
Page 7
PANEL 1- Meh-Ran stabs his lightsaber into the massive machine.
PANEL 2- Meh-Ran leaps into the air ripping the machine in two. Mal-Zey forward flips over Meh-Ran’s lightsaber’s arc.
PANEL 3- Mal-Zey lands in a defensive crouch with his back slightly turned towards Meh-Ran.
MAL-ZEY: Not bad, brother! If you fought like this back then maybe that wife and runt of yours would still be alive.
PANEL 4- Meh-Ran has lost it. A berserker fury has taken over. He runs at Mal-Zey.
PANEL 5- The lightsabers slam together sparking.
PANEL 6- Mal-Zey leans in close as they are pushing against each other’s lightsaber.
MAL-ZEY: That’s it brother, use that rage! Only by embracing the Dark Side will you destroy me!
Page 8
More fast and furious panels.
PANEL 1,2,3,4,5,6- Meh-Ran swings his lightsaber around. Meh-Ran lets loose with a barrage of strong blows. Mal-Zey blocks most with no problem, but the last few get a little closer than he’d like. Mal-Zey is backing up, the edge of the building is getting closer. The winds are getting fiercer as well.
Page 9
PANEL 1- Mal-Zey is blocking and looking a little nervous. He’s very close to the edge.
MEH-RAN: What’s the matter, brother?
PANEL 2- Mal-Zey is right on the edge now.
MEH-RAN: May your soulself burn in the Eternal Fires of Saizu!
PANEL 3- Meh-Ran swings his lightsaber down about to cut Mal-Zey down, or at least knock him from the building.
PANEL 4- Mal-Zey dives and rolls to Meh-Ran’s left.
PANEL 5- Meh-Ran is in mid arc as Mal-Zey brings his lightsaber around. He is aiming for Meh-Ran’s forearm.
Page 10
PANEL 1- Huge panel of Meh-Ran’s lightsaber arm being sliced in two by the elbow. Meh-Ran is holding back the pain.
PANEL 2- Shot close up of Meh-Ran’s arm holding the lightsaber as it plummets over the side of the building. It should be miles upon miles to the ground. We shouldn’t even see the ground.
PANEL 3- Close up of Meh-Ran’s face. Pain, rage, and fear.
PANEL 4- Shot of Mal-Zey with his lightsaber still ignited, chuckling to himself.
PANEL 5- Shot of the arm and lightsaber a little further than before.
PANEL 6- Full shot of Meh-Ran turning to his right to face Mal-Zey. He is extending his left arm.
Page 11
PANEL 1- Shot of the lightsaber being ripped free from Meh-Ran’s lost arm and flying through the air.
PANEL 2- Shot of Mal-Zey chuckling again, with his lightsaber raised about to strike.
PANEL 3- Close shot of Meh-Ran’s lightsaber flying up into his left hand.
PANEL 4- Huge panel of Meh-Ran slicing a gash across Mal-Zey’s chest. Mal-Zey is very surprised, to say the least.
Page 12
PANEL 1- Mal-Zey looks up and he is pissed off. But he is also smirking.
MAL-ZEY: My, my, brother…I didn’t know you had it in you to be so…brutal. I like it.
PANEL 2- Meh-Ran readies for another strike to end this.
PANEL 3- Mal-Zey throws his hand forward.
PANEL 4- Meh-Ran is slammed backwards off the side of the building.
PANEL 5- Downwards shot of Meh-Ran falling backwards.
PANEL 6- Mal-Zey readies himself and leaps off the side off the building.
MAL-ZEY: WAIT FOR ME BROTHER!
Page 13
PANEL 1- Mal-Zey drops through the air feet first, streamlining his body, to catch up to Meh-Ran. Lightsaber still ignited.
PANEL 2- Side shot of Meh-Ran flailing through the air and Mal-Zey catching up as they plummet down the building past domed catwalks filled with surprised onlookers.
PANEL 3- Mal-Zey turns his body to catch the wind to slow himself, and attacks with his lightsaber.
PANEL 4- Meh-Ran blocks the blow with his lightsaber.
PANEL 5- The two men spin through the air while swinging their lightsabers wildly, blocking each other’s shots.
PANEL 6- Meh-Ran whips himself backward through the air.
Page 14
PANEL 1- Meh-Ran and Mal-Zey just miss a domed catwalk, each of them passing on either side.
PANEL 2- Mal-Zey leans forward, shooting towards Meh-Ran, lightsaber stretched forward.
PANEL 3- Meh-Ran curls up and spins over Mal-Zey’s head.
PANEL 4- Meh-Ran uncurls, and lashes out with his lightsaber, Mal-Zey blocks.
PANEL 5- Meh-Ran shoots his hand out, while still gripping his lightsaber.
PANEL 6- Mal-Zey slams against the building, letting out a loud “Ooomph!”
Page 15
PANEL 1- Meh-Ran then points and shoots his hand upwards.
PANEL 2- Mal-Zey is still woozy from the hit against the building. His lightsaber gets yanked free from his hand and flies upward.
PANEL 3- Meh-Ran moves in close and grabs Mal-Zey. Meh-Ran holds his lightsaber just inches from Mal-Zey.
MEH-RAN: I will have my revenge before I die!
PANEL 4- Meh-Ran about to strike, suddenly looks very surprised, as does Mal-Zey.
Page 16
PANEL 1- Side shot of the two slamming into a passing flying car.
PANEL 2- The car is big enough so they didn’t damage it too bad, they just smashed into the roof. It stops flying and hovers.
PANEL 3- The two men are very woozy but are getting to their feet. An alien pops out of the roof hatch.
PANEL 4- Shot of the alien. He looks pissed off.
PANEL 5- Shot of the two men from the alien’s POV. They are broken, battered, and beaten and look very, very pissed off too.
PANEL 6- The alien mocking a whistle goes back into the hatch, sealing it behind him.
Page 17
PANEL 1- Meh-Ran turns back to Mal-Zey. He reignites his lightsaber and begins walking towards Mal-Zey. Mal-Zey is looking up, discretely.
MEH-RAN: Now, I finish this.
PANEL 2- Mal-Zey holds his hand out.
PANEL 3- Shot of Mal-Zey’s lightsaber falling through the air.
PANEL 4- Huge panel of Mal-Zey, who, in one fluid motion caught his lightsaber and blocks Meh-Ran’s strike.
Page 18
PANEL 1,2,3,4,5,- Various shots of the lightsaber duel continuing atop the hovering car. Fast, furious, and just nasty fighting.
PANEL 6- Mal-Zey tackles Meh-Ran and they drop off the car.
Page 19
PANEL 1- Meh-Ran is struggling with Mal-Zey as they fall.
PANEL 2- They continue to struggle as a catwalk is approaching fast.
PANEL 3- Big panel of them smashing through the roof and hitting the catwalk. No one is on this catwalk. Meh-Ran takes the brunt of the fall.
PANEL 4- The two men lay there unable to move for the moment.
Page 20
PANEL 1- Mal-Zey is scrambling as he lays flat against the ground for Meh-Ran’s lightsaber, which is just out of his reach. Meh-Ran sees what he is reaching for and pulls him back by his leg.
PANEL 2- Mal-Zey is crawling towards it and Meh-Ran is dragging himself along using Mal-Zey’s robes.
PANEL 3- Closer and closer. Mal-Zey’s fingers are an inch away. Meh-Ran is almost lying next to Mal-Zey.
PANEL 4- Mal-Zey grips the lightsaber. Meh-Ran grabs Mal-Zey around the neck.
PANEL 5- Shot of the lightsaber igniting.
PANEL 6- Shot of a manic Meh-Ran as he SNAPS Mal-Zey’s neck.
Page 21
PANEL 1- Big panel of Meh-Ran pushing himself to his feet. The Mal-Zey corpse lies at his feet.
PANEL 2- Shot of Meh-Ran looking solemn and remorseful.
MEH-RAN: What have I done brother? What have I become? I am the true tragedy of our clan. I have let our legacy die in disgrace and hatred.
PANEL 3- Meh-Ran picks up his lightsaber.
MEH-RAN: Forgive me my clan, forgive me Meh-Li, Meh-Bya…
PANEL 4- Meh-Ran looks distantly at Mal-Zey’s body.
MEH-RAN: Forgive me brother…I’m sorry I wasn’t able to save you this time.
PANEL 5- Meh-Ran drops to his knees, lightsaber in hand.
Meh-Ran: May Tensou have mercy on my soulself.
Page 22
PANEL 1- Half page close shot of Meh-Ran driving his lightsaber into his stomach.
PANEL 2- The rest of the page is a far shot of the catwalk, centered on Meh-Ran lying dead on his side, next to Mal-Zey. Lightsaber unignited.
Titanium Old School Script
Page 1
Panel 1- The night skyline of a futuristic city. There are billions of lights coming from all over. I was thinking something similar to Neo-Tokyo in just about any anime.
CAPTION:
CONFLICT. US VERSUS THEM. IT’S THE ONLY UNIVERSAL CONSTANT I’VE SEEN.
Panel 2- Zoom in to a fairly deserted street where there are flipped over hovercars as well as other futuristic looking innovations. Two groups of men are firing at each other with fairly sophisticated and highly destructive handguns and are causing massive property damage. The two groups are wearing black suits with two different designs. One group’s suits have a “UC” symbol and the others have a Government Seal. The men with the Government Seal are slightly outnumbered.
CAPTION:
I HAVE A THEORY THAT LIFE IS CONFLICT. THAT’S WHY ALL HUMANS GRAVITATE TOWARDS THINGS THAT WILL HELP CREATE PROBLEMS MORE THAN SOLVE THEM.
Panel 3- Closer in on the firefight as the government soldiers are being gunned down. It doesn’t stop them from holding on and continuing to fire away. One of the hovercars is in flames.
CAPTION:
THERE WILL NEVER BE AN END TO WAR. IT WILL JUST CHANGE AND ADAPT. AS LONG AS THERE IS A CAUSE, THERE WILL BE MEN WILLING TO DIE FOR IT.
Panel 4- Extreme downshot, with a heavy vertigo feeling to it. A shiny, metal-skinned man with black hair and dressed in a black suit with no shoes stands on the edge of one of the skyscrapers at least 30 stories up. He is faced away from us and is standing on the very edge of the building and is about to fall off. His tie is flapping in the wind.
CAPTION:
DYING FOR A CAUSE ALMOST SEEMS LIKE THE SMART MOVE. AHH, DEATH. IT SOUNDS SO INVITING.
PAGE 2
Panel 1- The metallic man is plummeting towards the firefight below. He is looking up towards us with a look of bliss on his face (otherwise he should always have a cold, emotionless look, devoid of any passion or interest) as the wind whips his suit wildly.
CAPTION:
IN TIMES LIKE THIS, I JUST HOPE THIS FALL WILL BE DIFFERENT. I HOPE THIS WILL BE THE ONE TO END THE CONFLICT. FOR ME AT LEAST.
Panel 2- The government and UC soldiers all dive for cover as the metallic man drops right into the flaming hovercar and the car explodes sending everyone flying backwards.
PAGE 3
Panel 1- The aftermath of the scene. All the soldiers are stunned into a moment of cease fire. The ones still standing are looking over the debris to see what has happened. The remains of the hovercar are scattered about and there is a large smoking crater where the metallic man landed.
Panel 2- Close up on the remains of the hovercar. There is a lot of smoke coming from the crater but we can’t get a good look in.
Panel 3- Same shot as Panel 2, but now there’s a metallic hand rising from the smoke.
CAPTION:
DAMN.
Panel 4- The metallic man steps out of the crater. His suit is charred into non-existence. He has just enough of a suit left to cover his privates. His hair is a mess and he looks like he is very, very grumpy.
CAPTION:
DIDN’T EVEN FEEL IT THIS TIME.
Panel 5- The metallic man steps between the two sets of soldiers and looks towards the government side. In the background we can see the UC soldiers are getting ready to open fire.
METALLIC MAN:
RUN.
PAGE 4
Panel 1- The metallic man stomps towards the UC soldiers as all sorts of laser blasts bounce off his metal skin. The metallic man has a look of bored hostility. More like he’s annoyed than anything else. He leaves potholes behind as footprints. In the background the government soldiers all run off into the distance.
CAPTION:
HAVE TO FINISH THIS AS FAST AS I CAN. LEAVE AS MANY ALIVE AS POSSIBLE.
Panel 2- The metallic man stops in front of the hovercar the UC soldiers were using as cover. The UC soldiers are backing off but continuing to fire away. The metallic man has his foot raised behind him, about to let loose with a kick.
CAPTION:
HOPEFULLY THIS WILL MAKE FOR A SUITABLE MESSAGE.
Panel 3- The metallic man has let loose with a soccer kick, sending the hovercar flying towards us.
Panel 4- The hovercar slams into the UC building shattering the giant statue of the UC logo (UC superimposed over the globe).
PAGE 5
Panel 1- The metallic man is walking away from the UC building. In the background the soldiers have all stopped shooting and are standing dumbstruck as they look up at the hovercar that is jutting out of their destroyed UC monument.
Panel 2- The metallic man is walking down the street. Hidden eyes are peering out of the windows lining the street.
CAPTION:
ONCE, MY ACTIONS JUST NOW WOULD HAVE HAD PEOPLE CHEERING MY NAME.
NOW, DISTRUST...FEAR.
THESE PEOPLE DON’T KNOW THE WORD HERO.
Panel 1- The night skyline of a futuristic city. There are billions of lights coming from all over. I was thinking something similar to Neo-Tokyo in just about any anime.
CAPTION:
CONFLICT. US VERSUS THEM. IT’S THE ONLY UNIVERSAL CONSTANT I’VE SEEN.
Panel 2- Zoom in to a fairly deserted street where there are flipped over hovercars as well as other futuristic looking innovations. Two groups of men are firing at each other with fairly sophisticated and highly destructive handguns and are causing massive property damage. The two groups are wearing black suits with two different designs. One group’s suits have a “UC” symbol and the others have a Government Seal. The men with the Government Seal are slightly outnumbered.
CAPTION:
I HAVE A THEORY THAT LIFE IS CONFLICT. THAT’S WHY ALL HUMANS GRAVITATE TOWARDS THINGS THAT WILL HELP CREATE PROBLEMS MORE THAN SOLVE THEM.
Panel 3- Closer in on the firefight as the government soldiers are being gunned down. It doesn’t stop them from holding on and continuing to fire away. One of the hovercars is in flames.
CAPTION:
THERE WILL NEVER BE AN END TO WAR. IT WILL JUST CHANGE AND ADAPT. AS LONG AS THERE IS A CAUSE, THERE WILL BE MEN WILLING TO DIE FOR IT.
Panel 4- Extreme downshot, with a heavy vertigo feeling to it. A shiny, metal-skinned man with black hair and dressed in a black suit with no shoes stands on the edge of one of the skyscrapers at least 30 stories up. He is faced away from us and is standing on the very edge of the building and is about to fall off. His tie is flapping in the wind.
CAPTION:
DYING FOR A CAUSE ALMOST SEEMS LIKE THE SMART MOVE. AHH, DEATH. IT SOUNDS SO INVITING.
PAGE 2
Panel 1- The metallic man is plummeting towards the firefight below. He is looking up towards us with a look of bliss on his face (otherwise he should always have a cold, emotionless look, devoid of any passion or interest) as the wind whips his suit wildly.
CAPTION:
IN TIMES LIKE THIS, I JUST HOPE THIS FALL WILL BE DIFFERENT. I HOPE THIS WILL BE THE ONE TO END THE CONFLICT. FOR ME AT LEAST.
Panel 2- The government and UC soldiers all dive for cover as the metallic man drops right into the flaming hovercar and the car explodes sending everyone flying backwards.
PAGE 3
Panel 1- The aftermath of the scene. All the soldiers are stunned into a moment of cease fire. The ones still standing are looking over the debris to see what has happened. The remains of the hovercar are scattered about and there is a large smoking crater where the metallic man landed.
Panel 2- Close up on the remains of the hovercar. There is a lot of smoke coming from the crater but we can’t get a good look in.
Panel 3- Same shot as Panel 2, but now there’s a metallic hand rising from the smoke.
CAPTION:
DAMN.
Panel 4- The metallic man steps out of the crater. His suit is charred into non-existence. He has just enough of a suit left to cover his privates. His hair is a mess and he looks like he is very, very grumpy.
CAPTION:
DIDN’T EVEN FEEL IT THIS TIME.
Panel 5- The metallic man steps between the two sets of soldiers and looks towards the government side. In the background we can see the UC soldiers are getting ready to open fire.
METALLIC MAN:
RUN.
PAGE 4
Panel 1- The metallic man stomps towards the UC soldiers as all sorts of laser blasts bounce off his metal skin. The metallic man has a look of bored hostility. More like he’s annoyed than anything else. He leaves potholes behind as footprints. In the background the government soldiers all run off into the distance.
CAPTION:
HAVE TO FINISH THIS AS FAST AS I CAN. LEAVE AS MANY ALIVE AS POSSIBLE.
Panel 2- The metallic man stops in front of the hovercar the UC soldiers were using as cover. The UC soldiers are backing off but continuing to fire away. The metallic man has his foot raised behind him, about to let loose with a kick.
CAPTION:
HOPEFULLY THIS WILL MAKE FOR A SUITABLE MESSAGE.
Panel 3- The metallic man has let loose with a soccer kick, sending the hovercar flying towards us.
Panel 4- The hovercar slams into the UC building shattering the giant statue of the UC logo (UC superimposed over the globe).
PAGE 5
Panel 1- The metallic man is walking away from the UC building. In the background the soldiers have all stopped shooting and are standing dumbstruck as they look up at the hovercar that is jutting out of their destroyed UC monument.
Panel 2- The metallic man is walking down the street. Hidden eyes are peering out of the windows lining the street.
CAPTION:
ONCE, MY ACTIONS JUST NOW WOULD HAVE HAD PEOPLE CHEERING MY NAME.
NOW, DISTRUST...FEAR.
THESE PEOPLE DON’T KNOW THE WORD HERO.
Bob Awesome & the Bowling League
Page 1
Panel 1. A figure in a helmet dismounts a dirt bike. He's wearing racing leathers with a yellow bolt across the back with hints of yellow about the lining of the jacket and pants. He's got a similar bowling bag hooked to the back of the bike. It's raining outside the Crossroads Bowling Alley where the remaining lit up neon letters flicker. There's a VW bug and busted up van in the parking lot nearby. In the far right background behind the building we see a small and barely noticeable (from this distance) flash of energy.
Panel 1. A figure in a helmet dismounts a dirt bike. He's wearing racing leathers with a yellow bolt across the back with hints of yellow about the lining of the jacket and pants. He's got a similar bowling bag hooked to the back of the bike. It's raining outside the Crossroads Bowling Alley where the remaining lit up neon letters flicker. There's a VW bug and busted up van in the parking lot nearby. In the far right background behind the building we see a small and barely noticeable (from this distance) flash of energy.
SFX: Heavy rain
Panel 2. Side shot of Max's fingerless leather gloves gripping the handle of his blue and yellow highlighted bowling bag. He's kicking open the door and walking in. In his other hand he lowers the yellow helmet to his other side, behind his legs. Waist shot showing his "balls" yellow and blue.
SFX: ding
Panel 3. Side wide shot of sunglasses wearing, young spiky haired, cocky douchebag with a sparse goatee. We see his patch on his chest reading MAX CRASH.
Max Crash: I need some cash and I hear there's a game to be found round these parts. Y'all know nothing about that?
Page 2
Panel 1. Wide shot of the empty bowling alley. Nick works the shoes and register, looking off whistling as he sprays shoes. Theresa shrugs behind the small diner counter. Empty space between them where the bar is located. It's a black windowed void with a blue neon sign flashing VICTORY beer. There's fake wood paneling on the walls. There should feel like there's something missing.
A quiet pause on this scene. We should get details in enough to keep the eye here for a three second pause. Draw the eye to Nick with the red shoes encircling him, blue neon dead center of the black windows, and Theresa stands between a rotating hotdog cooker and a pretzel warmer, a soda machine with a purple ROYAL COLA logo behind her.
Panel 2. Half length. Max Crash walks by Nick's desk where he pulls out a pair of shoes and examines them. Max has his eyebrows raised at the thin, tall, utterly lanky Nick O'Time.
Nick: We charge three bucks per game. A dollar plus for shoes.
Panel 3. Theresa leans on the counter, which would be seductive if she weren't doing it in all her tomboy innocence. Max angles his sunglasses down and looks over Theresa.
Theresa: Want a hotdog or pretzel before you pick a lane?
Panel 4. Head shot of Nick and Theresa in reversed layout with Max in the center. Theresa peers around the corner on the left, Nick extends his long neck to spy from the right. Faint glow of the obsidian glass and VICTORY neon sign reflected on his sunglasses.
Max: I think I'll have a drink.
Page 3
Panel 1. The dark of the Futile Bugle Bar & Lounge is like the void of space. A few round tables and small chairs are lit up by pyramid lights off to the left. A row of booths is on the right along the wall. The red leather and paint on the tables is all there is to be seen. In the background is Max Crash standing in the doorway, propping open the door with the yellow helmet in his hand.
Panel 2. Max saunters up to the bar, resting both helmet and bowling ball bag on the bar ledge. Side shot, we see the bar extending off to the right. There should be an empty spot design-wise where a Demonic figure could be but rather it's seemingly empty.
Max: Yo, un cerveza por favor.
Panel 3. Max turns his back to the bar as he takes off his sunglasses. His eyes, now finally revealed up close should make him seem human, vulnerable. Rather than the other pages making him look strong, all the remaining pages will make him look worse and worse. A hint of a fiery form over his shoulder.
Max: Hey barkeep, where're all the hustlers and marks?
Page 4
Panel 1. The Devil is working bar. Maybe just a hint of devilishness to him, looking more human the more we stare directly at him, but shifting forms when no one is looking.
The Devil: Out looking for a game then, son? A wager, a deal, a risky proposition for the glory of gain? This is what you seek?
Panel 2. Max gestures wildy to the right, on the left the Devil is a chtuloid gelatinous mass, tentacles and horror. Max is looking far off where his gesture points the way.
Max Crash: My name is Max Crash, adventurer unparalleled. I've swam the length of the Atlantic Ocean...
Panel 3. Max swings his open hand right, the devil sliding into a slithering serpent shape with small feathery and scaly wings.
Max Crash: and then just completed a marathon cross country dirt bike race...
Panel 4. Close up on Max staring down at the Devil. Pounding both fists on the bar making the helmet and bowling ball bag rumble in the shockwave.
Max: While I was on the East Coast I figured i'd grab my bowling ball and try out the Legend...Bob Awesome...challenge him to ten frames, ten pins, ten thousand dollars at stake.
The Devil: I see. How...ambitious.
Page 5
Panel 1. The Devil points towards the Emergency Exit with his long black fingernailed finger. Half forming a demonic horned figure behind Max as he urges hims forward.
The Devil: Head out back, he should be out there right now taking care of something.
Panel 2. Max walks off, framed by the Emergency Exit door. A NO EXIT sign is overhead.
The Devil: You must be so proud of your skills to come here seeking Bob.
Panel 3. The Devil looks tiny and trapped within a cage but really it's just the layout if the bar. The poles holding up the glass racks alongside the rows of glass bottles make up the bar. All crystal white shine among the glass and mirror with the blob of red floating in the center, barely a man.
The Devil: A warning. Losing to Bob may cost you more than you realize.
Page 6
Panel 1. Max stumbles a bit as he finds his footing on the unexpected steps out back. There's a high bright amber light above him lighting up the garbage bins, a flipped shopping cart, some concrete blocks for sitting on it would appear, and a circular patch of dirt.
Max: Whathefu-
Panel 2. Max stands at the edge of the circle of amber light, across from the emergency exit of the bowling alley. A dark void of a field lies behind him. It is a blackness that swallows up light. A flash of blue energy, small but powerful sparks in the dark behind Max.
Max: Stupid hickseed bowling champ needs to be shown what real bowling is all about.
Panel 3. Shot from within the field. Max is seen dissected by the reeds of overgrown grass blowing wildly in the wind. He furrows his brow as he peers into the darkness.
Max: Yo, Bob? If you're done peeing maybe we can get a game of knock em rock em in?
Page 7
Panel 1. A foul, disgusting beast, with long arms flailing about tears out of the dark of the field. It's mouth is full of disgusting teeth, saliva muck dripping from it's teeth, the arc of it's wild swinging arms just slicing Max's leathers as he throws himself backwards. Max is screaming manic. Much like a little girl.
Beast: Gnnnnnaaaarrrrrlllll
Max: shreeeeeiiiiiiikkkkkkkk
Panel 2. The beast explodes from the inside out as an intensely glowing blue ball explodes from within, spinning wildly with raw crackling energy.
SFX: kra-kooosplooosh
Panel 3. We get a better view of the energy ball as it levitates before Max's eyes, lighting up his entire face. He is dumbstruck, in awe of its power. It's rotating and slowing down.
Max: wha-wha-da-holy-bejeezus...
Page 8
Panel 1. Bob Awesome walks from the woods. His whole body crackles with blue energy as the glowing ball floats back to his open palm beside him. He looks like a regular joe, a bowling shirt on, baggy jeans on, hair that looked like it was combed nice before a monster roughed him up. He eyes Max Crash suspiciously.
Bob: I thought I told everyone to stay inside. Who're you? Did you come out of the portal too?
Panel 2. Max Crash, all bugged out, sitting in a cloud of dust, tripped over the concrete blocks, right under the spotlight. The glowing ball is all he can stare at. It's in the imediate foreground, a part of the bottom right of the panel.
Max: I'm Max Crash, adventure extraordinaire...and...uhh...
Max: And I challenge you for that bowling ball of yours.
Panel 3. Bob raises up the glowing ball, which hovers just above his hand, as if he were looking down the lane at a pyramid of pins.
Bob: haha. Okay kid. When I win though...
Bob: You'll be stuck here forever.
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